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I'm reminded that I live here because it's familiar and I can't afford to move.
I don't hate it and bailing out of here isn't an emergency situation but it's definitely one of those things, like being trapped in the Bay Area, that grinds through emotional resources.
And this is a thing cause at some point all the little stuff- I’m an NPC in the “important” stories, my government sees me as disposable yet worth taxing, I’m trapped in the Bay Area, I’m an H-list artist in furry fandom, I can’t afford martial arts or weightlifting that would help me chill out, etc, none of it’s HUGE- adds up and I go straight from this is stressful to wanting to put a knife in myself.
The less little stuff I have in my life the better.