I'm reminded that I live here because it's familiar and I can't afford to move.
I don't hate it and bailing out of here isn't an emergency situation but it's definitely one of those things, like being trapped in the Bay Area, that grinds through emotional resources.
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And this is a thing cause at some point all the little stuff- I’m an NPC in the “important” stories, my government sees me as disposable yet worth taxing, I’m trapped in the Bay Area, I’m an H-list artist in furry fandom, I can’t afford martial arts or weightlifting that would help me chill out, etc, none of it’s HUGE- adds up and I go straight from this is stressful to wanting to put a knife in myself.
The less little stuff I have in my life the better.
