Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

@wolfe yes but only in the sense of getting kids to eat broccoli by pretending it’s li’l trees

like The Song of the Count, John Cougar Mellencamp's "Small Town" improves with a few conveniently timed censor beeps

@eredien the joke is it's an entirely instrumental piece and has no lyrics (though it is southern rock, definitely). It *might* be, for all I know. The Meat Puppets aren't an especially sober group.

@Austin_Dern but there is Bill Holbrook.

https://ko-fi.com/C0C85TPG

I have a Ko-fi in case anyone would like to help me out. I just got a speeding ticket for doing 26 in a 20 zone, and I'm still trying to fight dental insurance reversing their approval 5 months after getting a tooth pulled, so I'm unlikely to win both.

so far I'm not digging the cisnormativity but some of the aesthetics are VERY Eberron

tell me I shouldn't watch Robots (2005) with the intent of mining it for Warforged focused Eberron content

"I cannot read the fiery letters," said Frodo. "But I can" said Gandalf. "They are elvish but in the tongue of Mordor, which I shall not utter here. But this in the common tongue is what they say;

"just open up your Ring
and try it front to bum"

"It is part of a larger poem."

a panini press is when you slowly lift increasing numbers of sandwiches to build up your arms

"music maker man! Your beats are bad!"
"Yeah, they're BAD!"
"No. Not good bad. Bad bad!"
"Whatever."

THUMP ting ting
THUMP ting ting

between the times when the oceans drank Atlantis
and the rise of the sons of Arius
I Aku the shapechanging master of darkness unleashed an unspeakable evil
and unto this: Conan!
wielding a magic sword stepped forth to oppose me.
It is I his chronicler who alone can tell thee of his saga
now the fool seeks to return to the past
and undo the future that is Aku!

* puts on "Five Piece Chicken Dinner" *

hooooey

there's some mighty fine NOODLIN' down in th' CRICK

people come up to me and they try to talk shit maaaan
I was makin' records when you was suckin' y'mother's dick!

SUCKAS THEY BEEN THINKIN' THEY CAN TAKE OUT ADAM HOROWITZ!

he goes to sleep by FALLING DOWN ON HIS FACE!

saw a convertible drivin' by
loaded up a slingshot, let one fly

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

this is the city
I work here
I have like no authority whatsoever

FUCK FUCK FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK THE FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUCK

Gyatei gyatei haragyatei harasogyatei boji sowaka.

here comes that awful feeling again. welcome the ugly animal.

about the time Pulp Fiction blew up and I owned the album, I worked at Quiznos, which had one of those giant 90s rotate 1-3 dozen CD players you’d set to random. If I’d ever wanted to see a tough Detroiter look like he was about to shit himself this got answered when I brought the album in and got the EVERYBODY BE COOL THIS IS A ROBBERY sound clip at about 10 PM with only two employees around

this memory courtesy of “Misirlou.”