Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

@Kyresti also they’ve graded me down on tone etc THIS ENTIRE TIME.

@Kyresti yep. Nothing I said to work with an angry caller counted positively. Just what I got wrong. Hopefully they’ll fire me and make it my fault and then I have to deal with that emotional fallout but I still get to escape.

Oh yeah and; their sample call was upset and I did my best to deescalate and they marked me down for saying “again,” because that could be perceived as condescending and not using active listening enough. It is literally impossible to please someone who’s pre decided how I am going to perform. I am fucking triggered rn but need to call shitwipe and have him tell me in the most accusatory manner what I got wrong, just like having to listen to my fucking Dad as a kid.

Hey guess who got as high as 80/150 on their fifth graded call? Yeah. This is like fucking grade school. I would rather work someplace that started with the assumption that I *might* be a good employee for them. Fuck this.

@robinhood I mean presumably his is pretty stretchy.

Mock call 5 is supposed to be a test of “caller angry about everything” so my boss (not my trainers) asked me into his office to warn me and check if I was up to it. I said yes because I feel that won’t change the core stuff I might get right or wrong (I feel okay with some material *not* tested by the prior 2 graded calls), and I’m already familiar with how bad bombing a graded call here feels. So I expect this to really emotionally wipe me.

Late stage capitalism, in which there’s actually lots of stuff I want to buy from folks who have been obscured by algorithms, while constantly trying to block or mute folks selling stuff that doesn’t interest me at all, and this is academic because I largely can’t spend much.

I don’t know the future, I’m not a telepath, I might for all I know actually get past this training. And if that happens then I look for something else and ditch these folks as soon as possible. But in the meantime I need to do due diligence about trying to get past training.

@Charlotte Oh... yeah. There's a lot here;

* I empathize with the seniors here. I saw how my grandparents died and that's not something I'd wish on my worst enemy. Currently my mother's mobility is nearly gone, so that's a fear, too. And a built in part of my age group was always being dismissed, so that's a thing too. I grew up learning who I was could easily be made not to matter when convenient; I'm only now starting to think my worth or simply my worth as *a person who happens to be alive* is more nuanced and basic than that.

* So I definitely get you about the online crankiness - especially given my hate-on for Boomers I can see where it comes from, but outside of my personal whatever it comes very close to other "well fuck those dudes" I've already lived through.

* Honestly this society doesn't offer any real ideological support for aging. You're SUPPOSED to have married, had kids and made a comfortable living off a career at my age, but surely I'm not the only person who's ever fallen through the cracks? And even if I lived up to that it's not much guidance for daily and existential stuff, and is largely someone's marketing gimmick the same way maleness is. Like a lot of adulthood I'm going to have to cobble together a "how do I deal with my relevance in life and losing friends" out of Buddhism, CBT and whatever all else I can get at.

Anyway that ran way long; thank you for your patience on this...

why do birds suddenly appear
every time you are near
just like me, they long to be
close to you
why do stars fall down from the sky
every time you walk by?
just like me, they long to be
close to you

You know what I think the video for "Today" is about right? https://youtu.be/xmUZ6nCFNoU

Amon Amarth be like "that last time I sang AAAXXXE it didn't sound quite badass enough, let's do another take" and Heilung be like "our new song Ale with lyrics taken from runes carved in a Vendel period spear haft they found in a bog outside Arhus"

#drawings today, an ogre chieftain hoists a fully armored foe high into the air, and a wizard (with her halfling scout friend) confront a weird undead! (My thinking is githyanki lich wrapped in spell bindings but levitating and using ghost hands to cast spells.)

I said FISH FUCK BABY
I'm gonna fuck you with a fish!
I said FISH FUCK BABY YEAH!
I'm gonna fuck you with a fish!
I'm gonna take a moa-moa and swim it up your butt!
You slut! You whore!
WHY ARE YOU MY MOM
WHY ARE YOU MY MOM
WHY ARE YOU MY MOM
WHY ARE YOU MY MOM
Fish fuck!

SLAY THEM ALL LET THEM COME!
LET THEM COME!
LET THEM COME!
THEY COME FOR
MEAT! SANDWICH! (crucify)
MEAT! SANDWICH! (crucify)
MEAT! SANDWICH! (crucify)
MEAT! SANDWICH!
MEAT! SAAAAWAANDWICH
MEAT SANDWICH, WHOA-WHOAAAA!

@Kyresti @Cheff @IrisKalmia yeah. Call center but sort of an unusual one in terms of scripted responses and verification procedure, hence the more involved training. I’m a good-not-great receptionist and thought I had a chance. Although I’m feeling less “I’m shit at answering phones and need to avoid it,” this place has made me feel like a failure and a trapped preteen, more so immediately after getting a seemingly-inevitably-poor mock call score.

@Cheff @IrisKalmia @Kyresti thanks; just the four calls went from giving somewhat accusatory sounding criticism to throwing me stuff I felt was largely off script and then giving somewhat accusatory sounding criticism. Rationally I know I can potentially get useful info from the mock calls and could still theoretically pull this one off; emotionally I feel like I’m 8-10 again and mostly lost interest in the job.

Man Tomas Giorello is so COOL!

@IrisKalmia @Kyresti I started looking yesterday, and hope to keep looking, but this job hinges on 6 mock calls and they’re trying to be fairly efficient, so I expect to complete those very soon (and wash out of them; grading on these has been harsh).

@Kyresti claiming UI. I feel trapped into waiting to be fired and feeling trapped never helps anything.