Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

I don’t like Twitter, I don’t like tech sector privilege, but I am horrified by how this power tripping piece of sentient fecal matter has issued hard working people an ultimatum to work harder or leave. Homeless camps are full of residents harder working and who contribute more to society than Musk ever will.

That sounds cold but I remember feeling sorry for him when he got Covid and within a few days he was using THAT as some sort of ego and money thing, I won’t make that mistake again, it’s his victims who deserve the compassion. And those victims aren’t just all of us, that includes the fucking enemy too.

I hate how that asshole’s back for 2024 and I get to face another run in with his demented cultists; even if he doesn’t win, people are PROBABLY going to die, as opposed to the huge body count from him winning, which thanks to SCOTUS is now a lot more possible. I don’t hope he dies because I hate him worse than Reagan, Bush I and Bush II combined, but because as soon as he goes EVERYONE is safer regardless of politics or location. We won’t be so lucky though.

Bad night for anxiety combined with seasonal dark ugh, and wanting to just skip out on work, later today.

sudden crushing sadness listening to Smashing Pumpkins' "Beautiful," if it's gonna be that way I'm gonna listen to the saddest STP song followed by the most nostalgic ones.

Just one #drawing today, two mecha (roughly humanoid and spider looking)

*massive Queen music*

"HAIL MING! RULER OF THE UNIVERSE!"

"And now the tributes from Orthodontia."

"We, the people of Orthodontia, we have suffered since you captured our retainers. We can offer you nothing this year except our loyalty."

My company’s former owner works as a consultant here despite being technically retired, I can see why he might want to. However he has a rescue dog, some sort of little poodle mix who makes him look young - not sure if it’s anxiety or old age, but she pees on the carpet and nearly constantly barks or whines when he brings her in (Tuesdays and Thursdays). My boss and coworker do not like her, she’s the only dog I remember actively disliking, which is something that really bothers me actually.

Fuck, i keep finding people who’re leaving Twitter for Mastodon servers which awoo doesn’t federate with.

It’s a mystery how much anything from a kale salad to a giant teriyaki chicken will generate the same amount of mid afternoon drowsiness. “Able to nap around 2-4” is definitely in my bucket list for ideal jobs.

So I’d seen photos of armor in Vietnam with Confederate flags, was wondering about any significance beyond the obvious racism and wow, not only the obvious racism but it’s actually WORSE. There are times when interest in military history takes you to some real dark places and given that as a default war involves people dying and crippled probably for no good reason, I don’t say this lightly.

What really supports this for me are fairly detailed memories of stuff with my friends Peter or Ryan, Russian class, stuff at gaming club meetings or gaming, and some fencing. All times and places when I wasn’t feeling controlled, watched, and susceptible to attack.

Just this big cloud of hypervigilance because I was in the same places with the same people, without enough food, sometimes without enough sleep, and just stuck/trapped/treading water in ways which would have created CPTSD if they hadn’t plugged right into the PTSD I had from the accident, AND with ethnic and Reagan Era trauma running constantly in the background. None of these experiences really have anything valid to say about my intelligence, looks, or capabilities.

I’ve been realizing just how much all the negativity is basically an artifact I could not avoid. Paul Ekman proposes an emotional refractory period based on frequency and intensity of experiences and until I got out there were no breaks. I’d go from actual abuse to merely routine criticism, isolation, or routine anger from my parents, without being to differentiate or depersonalize it because I literally did not have processing time or much positive input.

Turns out the Paul McCartney song The Beatles didn’t perform was “Tip of my Tongue,” which they didn’t think quite worked for them and got played by other groups, rather than something like “I’m the Beatles’ Best Drummer and Also Lyricist.”

Someone on the radio was talking about their friend’s last words (nicer Beatles lyrics). I thought; if I didn’t know what my last words should be, what sort of incoherent gunk would I be giggling about? And then I thought; if I’m *lucky*, the shema will be hilarious anyway, because then I’ll see the funniest jokes ever and I won’t feel fear anymore. Comforting. This is assuming I don’t go in a puff of smoke because someone decided to press a button or I choke on my own lungs or w/e.

re last boost; huh huh huh that's COOL. Skulls are cool.

#drawings today, a bugbear hits an adventurer in the noggin with her warhammer, and a wizard uses his magic staff to ward off the breath attack of an abyssal dragon.

A cheese packaging machine in action at the Tillamook factory!