Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

What I know about the future;

* I’ll die probably thanks to something stupid and avoidable.
* There’ll always be excuses for downplaying or displaying antisemitism.
* Democrats won’t fix things.
* My parents won’t recognize or make up for what they did to me.
* Rent will increase.

In the face of this I need to retain some hope about my life.

Pity Terrence McKenna, who could only say 3-4 distorted sentences at a time.

“Could you pass the butter? I’d like some on my geometric progressssssions.”
“Sure! Nice weather this morning.”
“And… the space elves have found a new way to communicate through the microrhizal network. Network. Network.”
*dance music *

Another night of falling so asleep that I'd snooze through the battle of Kursk in the next room and then 1-4 hours later I'm very awake and possibly with acid reflux

It's profoundly ironic that I spent all this time and energy trying to unlearn all the suicidal ideation, and my *stomach lining* still wants to kill me.

Apparently dinner had just enough mild acid (lemon juice etc) to be somewhat less upsetting than a giant margarita and a peppery burrito, so about as much as a late night bowl of oatmeal.

YT video: "So should your character be defensively moving?"
"When he's raging? Probably not. He'd be like, berserker."

Me, still stuck in the 90s: My love for you is like a truck BESERKIR! #ThatWasBeautiful

Okay am I imagining this or were big hiphop tracks from the 90s faster paced than a lot of popular hiphop now?

current mood; punctuating The Police's "Message in a Bottle" by bouncing up and down declaring I WILL K*LL HIM. Really you can do that for any Sting song though.

(doo doo doo
duh doo doo doo
duh doo doo doo
duh da doo doo duh duh doo)

ooWEEEEOoo
EEEEooo
weewaawooWAAAAAOOO
waaaaooo
waaaaooo
waaaaooo
oooWEEEOooWEEEoooWEEEoooWEEooWEEoo

this concludes tonight's acapella performance of the Doctor Who theme.

Somehow I doubt a country rehabilitating the memory of SS men and collaborators, which has rallies chanting about murdering us, is wonderfully anti fascist. Even in the USA or Britain it’s quite possible for “both sides” to be antisemites, so I don’t hold out high hopes about Ukraine or Russia.

Now that my self worth is a lot more robust, there’s a lot of FOMO that used to get conflated which is more it’s own thing. Less feeling life is a brilliant adventure which I’m too shitty to get at, and more feeling life is a brilliant adventure which I largely can’t have for no particularly good reason.

I'm starting to really think Pathfinder 2e or Dungeon World answer my dissatisfaction with D&D.

also mostly because outside of the CSA there's not a white supremacist undertone, I am so sick of military history ANYTHING focused on the fucking Wehrmacht. Humans have been killing each other over complete bullshit for millenia, so why THESE particular dudes? Admittedly there's a nationalist tone to idealizing samurai but I think the way Koreans TRASHED the invasion really puts a soggy mop on that.

"Do you want to feel rewarded for carefully thinking out potential problems? Play a wizard.

"Do you want to grab for whatever spell turns out to be most useful AND you get to LOOK FREAKIN' AWESOME? Play a sorcerer."

my hot take is; LotR is simultaneously conservative and anti-war, very much bog standard adventures for English boys mixed with *questioning* racism and violence, both Christian and very pagan, and bounces between a highly literate academic's worldbuilding and a storyteller's knack for drama. In other words, I don't think anyone BUT Tolkien could have written this exact combination of things. I think LotR looms so huge because it's *that* unique.

hey question for you. This person I don't know followed me out of the blue on Birdsite and their whole feed is asking people for donations for their daughter's surgery. They're presenting Queer/Latinx for this too; I really feel it's too convenient to be a real person in need, but what if they *are*?

May I ask what you think please?

So I was curious and Tolkien never said what Tom Bombadil was; Tom dates from poems in 1937 so before LotR, inspired by a toy his kid had, and JRRT just liked him and wanted him in the story. One scholar thinks Tom’s actually the Vala, Aule. The rest seem to think he’s some sort of Christian metaphor, which does make sense for the most Catholic author ever.

It fuckin’ wimdy. Selfie from earlier today!

makin' stuff from the Ottolenghi cookbook, singing the peppiest version there is of "Crucify" and "Silent All These Years." I can't actually do the entire album from memory though.

Reviewing all the old photos on my phone, the beginning of 2019 feels so remote and distant. This would worry me less if it weren't that the beginning of 2022 feels remote and distant.

it's my favorite Nirvana track, "Aberdeen Sucks and I Want to Die."