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Realizing or rerealizing today that an abusive childhood, with lots of catastrophizing and which you’re also being told is sheer bliss, leaves you with kinda crummy boundaries as an adult, such that there are situations which are “kinda crappy but workable.”

late to the game thoughts about “white privilege” 

So I realized; since bad policing doesn’t hit white (or passing) people as often, it’s not just those people don’t see it so there’s less reason for them to think it exists, but economic prejudices (and I feel like the pigs also view their jobs as a moneymaker, like why they go after younger people and protesters) mean the people better equipped to fight back legally aren’t in the picture. It intersects.

HUMOUR WARRIORS, in which four worthies are transformed to draw 'pon the power of each of the four humors. Yellow Bile! Lady Blood! Good Master Phlegm! and of course the ever-lovin', blue eyed Black Bile.

... this is a joke, "Lady Blood" was probably from late 90s Image comics.

oorgh. Big big anxiety spike, so I took a melatonin, ate some antacid, and hopefully will fall back asleep soon. Though.. waking up does mean I remember an elaborate dream I would've forgotten otherwise, in which I got to see a friend from NorCal.

political opinion/semantics 

Unfortunately so much right wing rhetoric is rooted in THE PRECIOUS CHILDREN that I feel like leftists do need to talk back just so it's not semantically uncontested ground.

But I feel like it needs to be proactive, highlighting how we want to *protect and benefit* kids, because I feel like there's this attitude of "THEY abuse children, not US," and regardless of how much truth there is to this, it's attack morality. I don't trust it, and suspect that distrust is widespread.

In tonight's experimental cooking, trying to use up the remaining gnocchi and cabbage plus some sausage by dumping cumin, cilantro and paprika on everything.

My company’s headquartered in Denmark, which means YouTube still assumes I’m there, and serves Danish ads, which give the impression Danes are utterly detestable self serving bourgeoisie. This isn’t an impression I ever got elsewhere, so I’m sure it’s the power of advertising.

The bisexual urge to telepathically duel with an alien in a trench coat while its allies screech and fly off into space, then to use your psychokinesis to release huge reserves of water and manifest the previously mythical Shell Beach.

Tonight I’m gonna party like it’s 1999! Gonna hop on the Internet via dial up and complain about how Jar Jar Binks isn’t funny! Cause I have opinions about that but don’t especially want to complain about Bill Clinton yet.

TTRPG violence 

spotted a post about firearms damage in D&D, and here's the thing; being shot is deadly. You could say the same for being hit with a bec de corbin, stabbed with a humble dagger, or bitten or swatted by an array of fantasy critters which make hippo or shark bites look minor, BUT

Hit points in old-skool D&D aren't just physical toughness; they're about luck and fatigue as well as blood loss and shock. Which only *sort of* justifies how mighty heroes should be able to keep going.

I feel like you can either go two routes with this; firearms damage is like all of these other terrible threats, stuff which can put an adventurer in a shallow grave - or another variety of hazard which an unrealistic over the top hero can survive. This gets back into how I've been feeling like my alternatives to D&D are either Dungeon World or Pathfinder 2e.

How does it look from there, Charles? Still fighting the good fight? From *here*, it doesn't look like they're playing by your rules!

"What's your name?"
"Jon."
"What's your REAL name?"

For someone who doesn’t really like DC, I sure seem to have opinions about Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman (who I seem to see as a tragic broken mess, an actually good person, and a mythologized warrior).

This Melvins track is so stereotypically heavy I can practically imagine the bubbling/sucking/coughing noises.

I seriously want to watch The Thirteenth Warrior with other people, so that I can introduce them to one of my favorite movies EVAR!!1!! and get responses like "uh... it was okay I guess."

the bisexual urge to quote the Havamal and to memorize more of it to make oneself a complete nuisance.

all caps, religious reference 

oh no, too much listening to Skald.

A WOLF SHALL DEVOUR THE SUN AND THIS WILL BE COUNTED A GREAT MISFORTUNE
A SECOND WOLF SHALL DEVOUR THE MOON AND THIS TOO SHALL CAUSE GREAT MISCHIEF

Okay so in "Seven Nation Army" they sing "everyone knows about it from the Queen of England to the hounds of Hell," which implies that they're HM the Queen's hell-hounds, which means they're corgis.

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