Cabinet Derg @Motodrachen@awoo.space

Playing powerwolf while waiting for a family christmas celebration. <3

Then again, it was my Mom who said I was kinda both genders at the same time when I was a Teen, and my younger brother had a non-binary S.O. for a couple years. XD

So it's not anything New in our family.

I own so many skirts, dresses, and otherwise girly clothes that it's actually kinda nice to clean up and get dressed up masculine.

Especially because when we went to my mom's tree decorating party, it was Kerithe fronting, in her favorite blue skirt and shirt, with our hair down.

And nobody said a damn thing. XD

Doing better today. Didn't realize how much post traumatic stress I was dealing with from my childhood.

I need to be more communicative when I'm hurting, not hide it behind forced cheer and extroversion just because my Mom would go off on everyone and ruin christmas if anyone complained about baking 20 dozen cookies for her Alcoholic friends.

I need to be open with others about my limitations instead of bleeding myself out for everyone automatically.

I need to accept that I'm not going to get emotionally reamed out for 24 hours just because I slipped and dropped a jar of pickles.

And it's a challenge when everyone is stressed and your alarm bells are going off constantly. It's hard to feel like everyone is stressed but not Because of You, when you're used to getting Blamed and Faulted and Guilted for things you didn't do, or intend to do.

That feel when you're suffering all day but don't wanna bring anyone else's mood down so you fake manic cheer all day and eventually Snap because you can't deal with one more interruption or someone else needing your attention or talking at you just because they need someone to talk at.

Best part of having long hair is having it played with. UwU

I get really irritated when some of my friends have deep spiritual problems but refuse to get creative enough to confront them.

Like... you can't use Science and Reason and Logic to address matters of the Soul. That's like trying to use metalworking tools to make a Cake.

Woooo! This is the first time I've been under 200lbs since I was like fifteen.

For some folks on here it's their transition from one gender to another, for me it's been a transition from one Category to another.
I thought i was going to be big and unattractive and totally unable to find sexy clothes that fit for the rest of my life and I was doomed to looking like one of the 65 year old Engineer Blobs at Lockheed.

Now? I can go to the Thrift Store and buy anything I want off the rack. jeans, dresses, skirts, fitted Tees... And they All look great on me.
And even when I want to dress masculine, I don't look in the mirror and see a 'M'lady' floating over my head in neon red letters.
I don't see the Phantom Fedora.

Downside of course is that I keep having to get Tohri and Keri redrawn to match my current body shape. XD

Why the hell am I the non-binary witch?

Like seriously, I'm just as mixed up and confused as anyone else, I just have Lore to fall back on because of my fucked up hippie upbringing!

Like seriously, that's the only major difference. I got brought up in-between, got the Secrets of the Goddess way too damn early and spent the next twenty years grasping at Straws.

I'm not Wise, I've just gotten knocked around more than most.

Feeling particularly enby today.

Pronouns are a challenge for me. I stick to He/Him IRL because it's just Easier.

And because everyone in my house is nonbinary and queer. Compared to most of my friends and family, I'm Male, but like just barely.

Compared to the rest of the male population? Pfffff No.

Sometimes I feel like I'm an impostor in Trans or Queer spaces.

Then I remember I've been a mixed gender multiple system since 2001 or so and got raised like I was supposed to grow up to be a woman.

So it's kinda like having Trans-ness thrust on you as a teen when all you wanted outta life was to be a neurotypical engineer. :\

Gender of the day: Soft drgn boi

Putting together playlists for each of your alters can be a fun experience. It's like leaving presents for yourself.

And it can help anchor identity and purpose to have your very own soundtrack.

Gender of the day: Fire and Death