Cabinet Derg @Motodrachen@awoo.space

*Shouts into the uncaring void*

*Void Faved your Toot*

So glad I didn't try and figure out my gender and sexuality at the same time.

I would have just ended up running around in circles.

But, like... When I faced down that part of me there was nothing left. I'd been so neurotic about toxic masculinity, I'd alienated a bunch of parts of myself that were Vital.

So as much as I've always been drawn towards the idea of being a Woman... Like, it's not representative of Reality.

That being said, being a Man is equally off the table. Having to figure out what it means to be Both in today's society.

One of the tricky things with my gender journey overall has been accepting my masculinity.

Yeah, I know, you're not supposed to like... Cast doubt on femininity and support transness and all that but internally it's always been something I treated like a Dark Side.

And that worked for a while, I was finally able to calm down and chill and get in touch with my femininity.
And then the testosterone nation attacked.

Another interesting thing that's happened is that... Thirteen years ago, my wife and I were sharing clothes, because we both wore jeans and teeshirts because we were both kinda genderless blobs.

Now we're a hundred pounds lighter each and we're fighting over who the sundress belongs to.

Been really enjoying feeling free enough to dress colorfully. I spent a lot of my life buying identical jeans and identical shirts because I was so convinced I was a walking grotesque.

And the payoff, that Freedom... I'm kinda glad I waited. I have all the other freedoms on lockdown. I don't have to worry about what anyone else will think.
Like I shouldn't have anyways, but it's different when you can drop fifty bucks on cute clothes at the thrift store and just Wear the stuff.

Ugh. Sometimes I feel like every single one of my hobbies, interests, or categories has to be the weird alt version.

Like, I'm a little bit of a gun nut. But it's a war chest of paintball equipment. I'm a Level 20 Airsmith.

I'm a motorcyclist. But my bikes get sneered at by Harley Dads, and smiled on by Their dads.

I'm a tabletop game fan, but it's tactical lego wargames.

I'm Queer AF, but I'm a male trash witch so I scramble silhouette recognition.

Like, This bike is a good reference point if you wanna understand my Gender. For starters, it's Foreign, in a weird category and they don't make it anymore.
And that was before I went and did what I wanted with it.

Also, ordered the cylinder kit to bring my Moped, Rocinante back to life.

If this motorcycle were a Person, they'd have gone through every bodymod procedure Twice, every inch is pierced and tattooed, and they've been legally dead four times.

Made some crucial mistakes with the cylinder pictured, and the carb was garbage, but the rest of it worked flawlessly.
Probably what I get for building an engine from trash.

Gender of the day: Manic Gay Pirate

Went to savers and bought some super cute leggings and some pretty hawaiian shirts.
And @budgiebin@snouts.online got a witch dress. It's Pretty.

Sometimes I feel like the only queer androgynous top in the universe.

Gender of the Day: FF6 Behemoth

I'm beginning to feel like I just needed Something to happen with my body one way or another.

It's stupid, like I like what Half of testosterone does, but can I get a pill that gets you jacked and energetic but also soft and sensitive?

I just don't wanna slide around anymore. It's hard to be yourself when magnetic north keeps moving on you.

I know I've been kinda quiet on here, been doing a lotta physical labor lately.

The cool thing is that I've worn a kilt and leggings to work so much that I now need a new kilt and some more diverse leggings.

I don't think I'm ever gonna buy another pair of jeans again. Just wish there were more options for skirts and dresses with a practical bent.

Duke Ironclaw, Lawn Tractor Pull Champion 2018. Chevy Tahoe shown for scale.

It might just be an accent thing but I like the new England he/him/his.

Because most folks leave off the H. So it's ie/im/is when pronounced.

Also 'er/ers for the feminine. Or just ey/eirs.

*Yaori does a basic 'Ten deep breaths' centering ritual and manages to achieve Id and Ego fusion for the three of us* O_O Okay, don't look at it just do it, this feels great.

Yaori: I wanna start a Pirate Metal band and get a whole blues metal pirate outfit together. I mean I might be Adorable but I'm riding in a flower pirate human. Like.
For me it's a stage persona to the rest of the world when I front Anyways. And we're all each another's audience.
I wanna make mine a Good performance.

*Alex Jones starts talking about Hillary clinton, saying she's a Demon, an interdimentional invader* Keri: O_o This guy... *Shakes head* Ugh I just wanted to watch Seth Myers snark on trump, not get a revelation that Alex knows about folks like me.

Like, not sure how I feel about that one. Entirely Possible the Bad Guys have their hands on one of Us.