depression, trauma, coping. 

I’ve had a moment today where i’m very much realizing how Not Okay i am and have been. I’m so completely oblivious to my own emotions that i’m just like “oh I’m really not okay aren’t i”.
Which seems silly because i’m in a really good place in life right now. I suppose, though, thats part of the issue.

depression, trauma, coping. 

Nothing made me realize just how bad things were than distancing myself from it all, and physical distance, as it turns out, was a big factor.
It has hit me in a crushing way, though, that i don’t seem to be able to really function right with. I mean, i keep crying and crying and sinking down and escaping when i should be doing work.
I went through so, so much and even though it was long ago, getting physically far away from the places i was traumatized hits hard

depression, trauma, coping. 

I almost died. Numerous times. Some of my friends -did- die. I’m been so damaged by my trauma that i don’t even function like others do. It took so much for me to get here and i did and just… looking at what i went through and realizing how deeply and wholly… I can’t even begin to think of a word for it. Like… deeply and viscerally scarred and devastated i am as a being.

depression, trauma, coping. 

@Jacel

Just going to thank you for the warning there, for when I get my own self to a better place.

@Oneironott

depression, trauma, coping. 

@Oneironott

Scarred you may be, but strong you are as well for managing to pull yourself out of that.

depression, trauma, coping. 

@Oneironott That sounds a lot like what I've had to cope with over the last year. And how all of it was tied to past events that never really clicked until finding a new shift in perspective.

You've got this, Vlo. You're not alone here, and you definitely have my support.

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