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stress, venting (-) 

I’m going to go cry myself to sleep now

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stress, venting (-) 

Buyer for my car fell through. Wasted more of my very limited time..
There is nothing but stress and internal screaming here as my time adds up to “less than two weeks”. I’m trying to motivate myself through while things pile up and i just end up crying every single day. It’s almost too much to deal with all of these feelings on top of all this stress and anxiety and a list of things i still need to get done, but am seemingly too stressed to progress with.

Kin Stuff 

What’s probably worse is that i continue to refer to myself wrongly and use demeaning/dismissive language in reference to myself

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Kin Stuff 

I mentioned this last night on chat but every time i have to utter “my fursona” or “my sona” practically feels like misgendering myself at this point ._.

Adorable ✨Plush✨ furry art 

ohmigosh ohmigosh ohmigosh!!!

..............................
Artist: Buck-Fire / Fidget
Source: furaffinity.net/view/23170145/

Taking an afternoon break from moving Stuff. Got a dirty chai sitting down at the local coffee place to get some writing done

Finally nailed down why ko-fi rubs me the wrong way. The implication behind "buy me a coffee" is "I'm doing fine, but you can give me a tip if you want", and I'm NOT fucking doing fine. When I ask for help it's because I need to buy groceries and keep the lights on, not because I want my next frappuccino to not come out of my paycheck.

I TFed a friend into a malamute last night over chat and oh gosh is life weirdawesome.
I like changing friends into other things????

past, dreams, nsfw, paws 

Plus, I apparently had a really sexy dream back then where I was just pinned under big footpaws and just smothering them with love and sniffs and licks and worshiping their sharp claws and
some
things
don't change <3

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past, dreams, abuse, reflective 

It has been far enough time and therapy to where these things don't bother me at all to reflect on, but it's interesting how much better I know my brain and how I dream now, to where I can definitely read what's going on in a way I couldn't then

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past, dreams, abuse, reflective 

Found an old dream log from the period of time where I don't have any memories from. I can't even remember some of the names that were written down. Other things spark a little memory, but otherwise.. it's.. depressing?
It's me having all of these dreams that are -very- fake and forced in their desire towards my [abusive] ex-boyfriend at the time in a setting of like.. horrible storms and settings that is very clearly my subconcious brain screaming for my attention

frustration, transphobia 

Spent way too much money on a meal i didn’t know was going to be so expensive. Almost plowed over on ice by some drunk fuck who called me a slur.

So very frustrated
Fuck this city

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Anyway thank you.
I’m going to bed
Largely like… sinking into worry and stress atm so ✨fuck that✨

Dreaming is better

money 

I’m so awkward remotely even talking about money jfc

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