Roady @Roady_Dragonfae@awoo.space

To properly recenter myself after this rant, I need to remember that these kinds of people are not only treating me like shit.

They treat everyone else like shit, and everyone else is aware of it. There's going to be assholes at every turn. I just have to be mindful of that between now and when I finally have my cabin.

Note. I'm not talking about anyone here. This community is the best. I just wish I could say the same about some of the activists I work with.

My end goal in life is to escape human society. As it sinks in that even in communities that are supposed to be accepting, there are still judgemental and condescending assholes who can't accept neurodiversity.

Part of being a shaman does involve varying degrees of this kind of alienation. I'm glad I've found those who can relate.

Because it hurts... It hurts so much to try and be kind and generous only to be spat on and judged for being "too quirky."

Koko is such an adorably photogenic dog! Love how she's enjoying herself on that warm spring day.

It's a dull, consistent pain I feel. That some people won't have the patience to deal with the fact that I think differently. That I have all of these quirks and occasional brainfarts.

They go around projecting that I'm an idiot when I'm simply just... Different. As much as it hurts. That's okay. I'm patient enough to understand them, it's their problem if they can't have the same amount of patience for me.

At the end of the day, at least I have the forest and my dog.

Additional characteristics include Anarchism, Pragmatism, and Complotism. This sums me up pretty damn well.

In just under a week of bringing Koko into my life, she's bonded to me like *snap* that!

I've made such a strong imprint that when I stepped away to use the bathroom at a friend's place she started getting antsy.

On top of the fact that she's so sweet, quiet, and loves to play! Since I started her antibiotics and nonsteroidal painkillers she's just been getting happier and happier!

As much as I wish I could rely entirely on a natural remedy, it's at a point where we just need to bite the bullet on this one...

Poor Koko has an infection... And an extensive one at that. The vet perscribed Apoquel and antibiotics because it's so bad.

Don't worry little one. I'll make you better.

Koko is the Japanese prefix for "here" or "this place." Which is a play on words I find incredibly fitting for my dog's incredibly Zen attitude and being in the moment.

At the jobsite, she's one with this place. When I take her to the park, she's one with that place. Anywhere I take her, she's one with that place. Taking it all in as a calm and meditative being.

After I found a place to park and I crawled into bed last night, Koko jumped right back in with me and curled up at my feet...

I'm so glad I brought this dog into my life... I'm taking her to the vet today to get her rabies booster and see if we can further pinpoint the cause of her allergies.

All in all. It's a reptilian brain thing. Little bugger likes to sink its teeth in and drag me down with it.

Jesus Christ... There are some days where my mind latches onto every circumstance and blows shit out of proportion... Even my dog forgives me when a part of me can't forgive myself.

In that case, maybe that's why she's in my life. To teach me how to not be so hard on myself.

I can't say it enough times. @mawr 's corgi puppy is an absolute beanie baby. I can't wait for him to meet Koko!

I think for now, I'm just gonna a focus on going by they/them pronouns instead of doing away with pronouns entirely.

It was fun to try, but I think that might be asking a little too much of myself and other people.

Case in point, this picture.

Koko's incredibly social when it comes to interacting with dogs. But only if they approach a certain way. When dogs approach slowly and offer time to snif each other out, she's perfectly alright.

Dogs that charge right up into her face get the dog bark equivalent of "FUCK OFF!" As she stays close to my feet. She even watches my back.

She doesn't bite, but she's incredibly aware of her personal space. Less than a day she's already loyal and protective of me.