Been trying to word this safely for a while. Haven't had much success.

I struggle with feeling ignored and unwanted sometimes. A lot of times. Most of the times.

I feel like I have to put in a lot of effort and expend a lot of energy to be included. Or even remembered. And I definitely rarely feel wanted enough to not have to initiate. Making first moves is hard for me, and I don't feel very good at it, so I don't do it very often, so I don't have to feel disappointment or hurt or anxiety from failure and rejection.

Which makes the few times I do try and end up with nothing feel even worse somehow.

I don't even get left on "read". I'm stuck on unread and feel very ghosted.

This just my feelings. This is not a fair or compassionate assessment. I just needed to say some stuff out loud.

@Motodrachen Glad you have you along for the ride! It's pretty fun in here, minus the annoying emotional navigation hazards and mental technical debt. Clear out some cache, have a seat, and don't extend any limbs you're particularly attached out outside the safe zone and you should be just fine!

@Motodrachen I'd be up for that!