🔶 KLCY AXIOM Prime @kelseyhusky@awoo.space

Spent this afternoon rolling like a Main Battle Tank on open terrain, removing the bandwidth limits on my emotional output channels and doing a deep and rapid purge of all the internal feels storage tanks. I feel so much lighter an easier. Even with my Class 2 rating, that was a pretty big load I was carrying and i didn't really notice how heavy it was until it was gone.

I have good things and plans in my future. And I want good things for all of you as well ❤ 🌊 ☀

+ Today is my last day on my current contract. It wasn't a bad month and it was nice keeping the same level of money coming in. All the same, I'm kinda happy to be leaving.

+ And now a local Giant Rubber-band game company wants to talk to me too! Getting all sorts of butterflies about getting to work for one of my favorite producers (even if they haven't made anything I've really loved in years)

- Really not looking forward to applying for unemployment again.

I ROCKED IT! Nile wants me to show up to their in-person job fest in early June.

This is doing wonders for my mood since I learned that my current contract isn't getting extended.

-: And there's the anxiety spike, right on schedule.

-: Obsessively refreshing my email hoping to get a positive response from Danube is not helping my calm.

0: Feeling kinda blank about flying to Cleveland for my little cousin's graduation. Happy for her, but at the same time, it stings that another family member succeeded where I failed

+: There is a huskybot movie coming out this summer. It's a "child and his X" movie complete with "protect X from government that can't understand the specialness https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=--8nr2kt4uk

I wish i understood circuit schematics more than I do. They are currently very, very difficult for me to decode and comprehend.

*vents excess heat from exhaust vents into thermocouple to recharge*

Oh spark. That was possible the easiest phone screen I've ever had. I was both super prepared for what actually happened, and way under prepared for what I thought was going to happen. I didn't get any questions on my past successes or failures, how I handled emergencies or difficult users, and nothing about counting manhole covers or piano repair people per capita.

I don't know if I rocked it or tanked it.

If anyone has any prayers, blessings, or cycles to spare, I could use some good vibes sent to my node today.

-: Really not wanting to stay at my current job means i'm putting pressure and hope on this interview going well, which likely means i will tank it. I'd feel better if I thought studying or flash carding would help.

+/0: Flying out this weekend for my little cousins graduation. She's graduating from the same college i got kicked out of 10 years ago, which is its own brand of family drama that I've kind of ignored cause i'm doing okay now, but history is a still a thing.

+: First round phone screen with Danube tomorrow. Direct hire position, with a semi-decent company that seems to treat their employees with decently hidden contempt.

0: Nervous/anxious about first round phone interview tomorrow. Pretty sure I can knock a passing percentage of the technical questions, but I'm really worried about the social portion of the interview. I can't answer "why do you want to work here?" with "cause it's not a contrract and i like not starving"

I just found these two things again and I am not okay. In a good way.

So, any Air Force plane that the president is on is supposed to be called Air Force One, right?

So, there was a seriously missed opportunity in the first Independence day for President Whitmore to announce

"Air Force 1, Fox 2!" when he's taking the first shots at the alien city killer spaceship when it's approaching Area 51.

Updating. Can't keep calling woe when things aren't bad, can I?

Inbox pinged with another favorable response to the resume blast i sent out 2 weeks ago, working data center for an international river themed online retailer headquartered locally.

Phone screen is scheduled for tomorrow during my lunch break.

Position wants some certs I don't currently have, but I don't anticipate any difficulty obtaining them.

Updating: Phone screen is complete. Not my best work. Was so amped up with nervousness that I was rushing through my answers and running out of breath while i was speaking.

Kept my use of thinking syllables down, I think, so I didn't sound too inarticulate, and i think I was really able to nail appropriate and convincing answers. Made the human on the other end laugh a few times, which has worked good for me before.

Hopefully this works out. Thanks for listening.

Members of the Tau can still be secret Slaneesh followers, right?

Updating: And I've got a phone screen tomorrow. The company isn't horrible as far as I can tell, and i'm talking directly to them instead of through a contracting agency, so improvement!

Still wish I didn't feel like such a fraud sometimes, though. Been in this game for 10 years, never lost a job because of lack of technical skills, but it's always my tech abilities that give me the most anxiety, not the social part that always bites me in the ass.

Updating: Apparently the universe was bored with my pity party and let me get 1 single reply email asking for my availablity for a phone screen with a technical recruiter. So, I got that going for me.

Not looking forward to all the anxiety about getting rejected after the phone screen, but at least i'll have something new to bitch about.

Rejection is preferable to being ignored. I haven't gotten anything back except automated responses. For positions that I know i'd be a good match for. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong so that I get stuffed into a waiting pool. I'd rather get told I got tossed into the trash, cause then I'd at least get validation on my self-hatred.

Which I know is a shitty thing to do to myself.

Shows how much I hate job hunting.

CGP Grey recently released a very awesome video animation that is an adaptation of Nick Bostrom's "Fable of the Dragon-Tyrant" I watched it last night.

I was surprised when I went looking for more information that instead of it being about the destructiveness of capitalism, apparently, the passage is supposed to be about death.

And I can kinda see that, but honestly? I think i prefer it my way. Take a look.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZYNADOHhVY