status update, vent, brainglitch
Still no date set on transplant. New medications for sibling to try, requiring a few days of hospital stay just in case. More waiting.
I don't know when this will end.
And even if/when it does, it feels like there'll be just...more hurt awaiting. Any thoughts of making plans in my head get cut off by screaming of the more likely scenario of their failure.
Five of Cups, but there's no bridge, no way past; the horizon is blotted out.
odds of BM happening at 15%.
status update, vent, brainglitch
A comment made by an aunt a few days back still rings in my mind: 'sometimes we need to be okay with letting go'.
it feels like this year has been so much letting go. erosion. making do with less. how much more will be enough?
more waiting. just...waiting.
i have food and shelter and safety- there's that at least.
@neonNeptunian *Every single hug and glow they can muster* This is so hard, hon-- and you're pushing through it with the strength of a champion. I'm proud of you, and still cheering you on from the sidelines.
The waiting is always the hardest part.
