Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

@LexYeen grr

@LexYeen *squints real dirty at you while she faves* >___<

Oof. We're up to six em dashes.

*doffs her fishing hat and looks solemnly at the ground*

There's no hope for the poor bastard. Because I tend to use them for sentences like "Your research on this task is really good—but your conclusions raise some issues."

@monsterblue (Watching over it again, I gotta confess Raisin is kinda Personality Development Goals for me. I long to be that calm and sweet on the surface but that efficient at humiliating bullies. :) )

@monsterblue Or to recommend another Spumco-style-adjacent but John-free animator... I could kinda see something entertaining done in the style of John Dilworth, the guy behind Courage the Cowardly Dog, especially this old Liquid Television short: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5vGJEJwIWE

@monsterblue We Don't Mention Spumco In This Household. :>

(Anthracite's a traumatized Spumo veteran. Oh lordy does she have some stories but they boil down to "it's all true and John K was a complete abusive piece of shit.")

Oh shit though. Hey @anthracite, any idea what it would take to get a commission of Rezy outta Katie Rice someday? :D

"Don't make me an optimist, you'll ruin my life." -- "Fleabag" (Phoebe Waller-Bridge), Fleabag S02E04

@monsterblue Here's a big secret by the way. You can make your own Martian Empress at home! Just find my ex Acetone_Kitten, take the absolute 180-degree opposite of their (very kind and scrupulous; quiet; minimally bitey) personality, and mix 40:60 with Hobbes The Plush Tiger.

The entire character was originally conceived as a foil for their clean, polite, responsible Mooncat species. :D

You can always tell an employee review is going to be a disaster when I have to start breaking out the em dashes—I have absolutely no idea why this is, I have absolutely no explanation for it, it just is.

@monsterblue Oh, here we go... https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fupload.wikimedia.org%2Fwikipedia%2Fen%2Fc%2Fcd%2FMarvelousMaureen.jpg&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FMarvelous_Maureen&tbnid=7zh_38e7GsRMmM&vet=12ahUKEwjJz6mVhK_xAhWLVKwKHcm-AUQQMygBegQIARBW..i&docid=ISkshhwYIg4yuM&w=240&h=415&q=marvelous%20maureen&ved=2ahUKEwjJz6mVhK_xAhWLVKwKHcm-AUQQMygBegQIARBW

@monsterblue Now I'm curious what cartoonist/cartoon's style you'd pick. :D

I already have my pick, but it's kinda obscure. See if you can find any trace whatsoever of a cheesy teen space-opera comic named "Marvelous Maureen" that used to run in Archie Comics' Pep Magazine...

Hey, probably-Aspergillus spores in my ear?

You're the worst symbiotes ever. No powers, no whispering voices, no hallucinations of alien lives, no instructions, no nothing.

Just get the fuck out. You've got 12 days and then I start pondering off-manual uses of the culinary blowtorch.

Doing a binge of Harold Pinter plays on Youtube was a really good idea. I really liked The Dumb Waiter, even just as low-analysis workday entertainment. I see the roots of so much of the "er, comedy" I like...

@chimerror She's not mad at us, she had just hoped for better things.

Wow. SNL did a sketch about an autistic girl at a clinic in 1979.

It... it has not aged well. Not well at all. Don't tell me there's no such thing as progress.

@zx3 similar feels today, robot friend *hug*

@001zlnv I am astonished it's taken this long for a Martian Empress Cone of Shame joke, especially from @anthracite-- who has shown the PATIENCE OF A BODHISATTVA through all this.

So this is "bad" and it's potentially "long and frustrating battle" bad, but it's also "known issue bad," "probably fairly cheap to treat bad," and "not the massive cholesteatoma and pricey surgery I was braced for" bad.

It's fungal swimmer's ear. I'm a little freaked out since it's been detected in both ears and I HAVEN'T BEEN SWIMMING but I have spotted little dots of mildew in our air conditioning. D:

Still. The ENT seemed pretty competent, and I've got a follow-up in a couple of weeks. Tomorrow morning I go to the pharmacy, get my prescription (which is essentially a vinaigrette) and become...

Salad Ears.

Waiting for my shockingly overpriced Lyft to take me to my ENT appointment, for a look at this ear infection that won't clear up.

All I can think about is the worst-case scenarios, what he might miss, what he might catch, and how much it might cost. Plus, how much this might delay me getting to see my elderly parents again.

Wish me luck.