Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

I have been dreaming of The House again.

I think I dream of The House maybe 12-20 times a year. It is not a house I have ever lived in, though it has some aspects of my second/current family home, my late (and very kind, and RICH thanks to my late Uncle Mac's 1979 investment in personal computers) Aunt Pauline's mini-mansion in Cleveland, and the Theta Chi house on Case Western Reserve campus.

It's a huge house, much nicer than anywhere I've ever lived in, at least where I wasn't living with 30 other people. Lots of windows. And most importantly, there is the Squeezy Thing.

The Squeezy Thing is a crack in the wall that only I can flatten myself enough to get through. It leads to a furnished, cozily run-down three-room lounge. When The House is in Ohio, it's where I hide all my weed and my *amazing* collection of gigantic sci-fi lookin' dream bongs. Huge plastic bubbly things, @Phorm could make a four-week resort vacation outta any one of 'em. 🧞‍♀️​❤️​

Usually there is Someone Else coming to the house-- the police, the landlord, pod people (but not the fun kind I would immediately surrender to)-- and I have to squeeze in. There's always a huge sense of triumph and mischief around The Squeezy Thing, and some of my worst nightmare are when it turns out They have another way into the Lounge...

Other than that, it's just night after night of phantom cats that need rescuing in some vague undefined way I'm not capable of, and of it being the last day of college and I have to either call my parents and move out in the course of two hours, or talk one of my old friends to take me in.

They never do. Mysteriously, these dreams started happening around the time I got kicked out of Transliminal. C'est l'amour. 🤷‍♀️​

@hystericempress A relatively staid acquaintance of mine just sent me the Pup Hood Discourse as an example of What's Wrong With These Kids Today and I am SO TEMPTED to just smack him in the snoot with your take.

@anthracite @xinjinmeng Also, this sounds like the intro to a New Wave song, quite likely by David Byrne. Or maybe Will Powers*.

*https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AO128UhPivE

@zx3 In the immortal words of Gramma Sengir, "It helps pass the time until you die." <3

@chimerror BLARGH i hate that *dle games won't let you go back and play old once -- binging when you first discover one of these games is one of the biggest hooks >___<

@chimerror (scout's honor i hadn't looked at what country was in yours <3 )

@chimerror *eviscerates game like a lame gazelle* <3

@chimerror *learns about worldle*

*salivates*

🐯​🍽️​🌍​

@spottyfox Oh, I'd never even heard of those other two!

@spottyfox So... September 26, 1990.

@anthracite @xinjinmeng She has just been asked to be let out. I really hope she reads the pamphlet I gave her about the virtues of ground-related social activities.

@anthracite @xinjinmeng Princess Fogbrain checked in via the Squeakypawbs Method at around 3:30 pm and is currently bumbling around the apartment with her sister. <3

@JulieSqveakaroo Congratulations!

@Phorm I dunno, that meme has considerable revival value. I think it might survive at least 2-3 trips through the Great Bulldada Cycle.

Fifteen minutes later...

*squeakersqueakersqueaker*

She's mashing her li'l pawbs on the front door, her standard way of begging to be let in.

Well, you're asking from THE GROUND, Amelia, so sure. You can come in and hide out from the rain for a bit.

Welp, Artie back outside. We let her hang out for the afternoon as a reward for sticking TO THE GROUND.

I fully expect we're gonna look up and hear SAD MEWING again, but at least we're getting her retrievals down to an exact science. *sigh*

I think next step is flush out neighbor in hopes of getting contact info for landlord. If they blow us off... I start consulting my Mad Engineers friends for advice. I am not above building Artie a ramp and then just busting a b̶i̶g̶ ̶f̶u̶c̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶h̶o̶l̶e̶ catdoor in the side door.

@001zlnv spiced morons

@zx3 (it's fine, I grew up on classic SNL and if we hadn't packed her off to the TNR clinic when she was a baby, she'd probably be an ignorant slut :> )

@Phorm Who in the HELL said that?!?

Yup. Right on back in the attic.

It's a sunny day, we left her a bowl of water, we have no reason to think she's in any danger up there, and we left the ladder in place so rescuing her should be pretty quick and easy.

It's fine. Short-term, I'm dealing, I'm surprised how low-anxiety I am about this. Long-term... I still have absolutely no freakin' clue what we're gonna do with her if she won't learn her lesson from getting stuck.