Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

Did I ever mention my favorite Last Unicorn character is Schmendrick?

Poor son of a bitch called something up that, while it was genuinely beautiful and kind, it was also so alien and distant that it could only break his heart. Participates in something beautiful and all he gets is the knowledge that he befouled something he was never worthy to really *know*. Because knowing it was just not possible.

Yeah, no identification there at all.

He moved with some uncertainty, as if he didn't know
Just what he was there for, or where he ought to go
Once he reached for something golden hanging from a tree
And his hand came down... empty

I dithered over the perfect #moodsnapshot for tonight, but I think I've finally settled on it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JH4kMZABAjA

Can I just go home now? :(

That's emphatically not a veiled suicide threat, just general melancholy and a desire to curl up somewhere cozy. I'm pretty firmly committed to surviving until (a) Trump is out of office (b) Peg no longer needs me (c) my Mom is no longer around to fret over.

I just... wanna go home, and I have no idea where that is. It's probably got a lot to do with the fact Peg is at con and I am a tad cuddle-starved. But a night in a 5-star hotel wouldn't hoit. :)

This isn't about any one person. This is about the way I've come to relate to my social circle in general. Things are not good. This is not yet a cry for help, because I'd really rather just be an idiot and stubborn things out again, but... yeah, I'll let you know.

Sorry, it's been a good day but emotionally exhausting. I feel like I just did the interpersonal equivalent of agonizing but necessary physical therapy. Thank god the attending nurse at least knew what she was doing.

Now I know how Ray Fokker did it. It's amazing how long you can walk around before you notice the holes.

Don't get me wrong, this is all the consequence of an evening out that was really, really great on its own merits. But yeah. Big revelatory holes were punched into something that I was REALLY hoping to pretend hadn't been hollow for years.

I'm going to be coughing up little sadness hairballs for a few days, probably. It's okay, I REALLY needed that trip to the vet, and much worse things would've happened had I not taken it.

Just... fuck you, Coyote. You were right about everything. Absolutely everything in that goddamned prophecy came true, and I wish I'd savored that last day in Space while I could. I really thought it would be coming back to me someday. But you were right, and you are a good trickster and a noble trickster, and fuck you your mangy ass a million times until you're as dead as this world you snicker at.

I think I finally had my Big Chill moment tonight. If you don't know what that means, it's not my problem. Get your punk millennial ass to Google. :p

As is only appropriate, it was honest, raucous, witty, nostalgic and deeply melancholy. And it makes the last few years of my life feel like... to borrow a phrase... I just got a really good deal on a used car.

That car's long since been driven into scraps, and I feel like so have most of the friendships I carted around in it. Way back when.

Of all the ways I expected today to turn out, "quiet productivity" was not high among them.

Now if I could only figure out what I did. Getting my brain to work is like one of those stupid little "slide the ball bearing into the hole" puzzles. And true to form, I usually just "solved" those by rolling them around at random until I got a result I liked. :|

This is still the best song in The Police's entire catalog. :p

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ized1XMRp_I&list=PLWiaTQ91EE2E916sGvFGYlUF_6wpkrXVg&index=38

This is why I don't worry about an armed uprising from the alt-right. Not only does all their military training come from Call of Duty, they pull brilliant moves like this guy trying and failing to make a swastika...

http://i.imgur.com/44UbQVw.gifv

All we have to do is send a bomber overhead, loaded up with cheap American beer attached to parachutes and "that guy called you a douche" flyers. They'll have, like, 80% casualties before they even cross the Rockies. >_<

special thanks to St. Brewster and the Wayback Machine for services rendered

There's just something about Ballard on a cool, sunny market Sunday that totally strips away six years of accumulated grumpiness about Seattle. I highly recommend it, especially if you're into snuggling other people's dogs. I have never seen so many dogs outside of a dog park.

10 am: ...leading to the complete stagnation of our culture with no way, once we reach that zero point of complete breakdown of a consensual relationship with the body politics in favor of a wholly artificial spectacle-ized version of...

10:30 am: ...looking right at me, and lookit those fluffy ears and OH MY GOD did he just lick my fingers, he's friendly, gonna pet him, yes, LOOKIT THE PUPPER, WILL YOU JUST LOOKIT...

Coming out to the cafe was a good idea.

I accidentally cut off a trailer full of golden retrievers in my dreams last night. It veered into the next lane and nearly crashed head-on onto another trailer full of golden retrievers.

They were like those car-hauler trucks, except the racks were made of soft-padded railing more like a roller coaster, and they had doggos strapped into them.

The doggos and drivers were all miraculously unharmed. I did get to check before I woke up.

Link to that Twitter thread about postfurry I mentioned earlier: https://twitter.com/doctorboda/status/950750291393163264

And most importantly, thank every single one of you, just for listening. I can't believe this is still a thing, let alone that people I haven't met know who the fuck we are. XD

I had always thought it was weird, back when we were constantly hammered by trolls, that we hadn't been welcomed more enthusiastically by other queer-nerd subcultures, because we had SO DAMN MUCH in common.

And here, it's happened. I wish I'd known back then I had nothing at all to worry about.

Mostly I'm just drawing attention to this because I need people to hide behind. ^___^;;; This hammers all my giddy-shy buttons, and it's good and bad in exactly the same way as being tickled.

I tend to do the same thing to postfurry that I do to myself, just naturally assume everyone's sick of it by now unless given clear evidence to the contrary.

I'm just so friggin' excited people adjacent to this circle see us as a net force for social good. All I wanted really. <3