Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

"Based on the Collected Works of Drew Barrymore..." http://samandmax.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/Hit%20the%20Road%20design%20document.pdf

#SamAndMax #LucasArts #FreelancePolice

I know I've linked to this before, but I swear to god, fluffing up this low-poly lion's mane is the most god damned therapeutic thing on the Web next to zombo.com. <3

https://codepen.io/Yakudoo/pen/YXxmYR

PROPOSED: Every aspiring video game designer must henceforth take at least one (1) course in each of the following subjects:

- Japanese aesthetics (preferably taught by a Zen monk)

- game theory (preferably taught by David Sirlin; if not, any other qualified sociopath will do)

- how to beat Rock, Paper, Scissors (preferably taught by William Poundstone)

I'm fucking tired of games that offer a host of play options and whistle-bells, but prove to only have one dull True Path through them.

Cleaned the FUCK out of the apartment, filled the pantry with dragon-compatible foods and weeds, finally taking a real break.

♫ tigers are both clean and warm
♫ and most are far above the norm
♫ whether here or on the roam
♫ have a tiger in every home!

I have many regrets in this life, but the greatest is that I never got around to playing a Yllabian Space Guppy on the MUCKs.

@mawr One stick, SIX BUTTONS. https://awoo.space/media/xX-ZLiunJYucFUGhNpo

Now, someone find me a monk and a strawberry. Stand back and I'll show you some REAL Zen in action. The looks on the monks' faces are always priceless. 😺​

#TigersAreTheBestFlavorEnhancer

Apparently I also I accidentally taught a Reddit mod the word "koan," so I got that going for me. 🐯​

*accidentally spills coffee on arm and rages briefly before sucking it out of own fur* WHY IS MY COFFEE STRIPEY? YOU KNOW I DON'T LIKE MY COFFEE STRIPEY! HNNNNGGGGHH! *buries muzzle*

*DING!* ☕2️⃣

#ApologiesToEricKaplan

Oh, wait. I don't NEED your food. I have <s>Oh Hungee</s> a quart of cold brew! *fangy, twitchy, slightly blurry grin*

*coffee cup labeled "1" slides across chyron and goes DING* COFFEE TIME!

#At100IGetSuperpowers
#DeathIsASuperpowerRight

That last toot reminds me-- you know what else would cheer me up? To FINALLY get that Robotron 2084 Prog/Brain-slash commission I've been wanting for over a decade.

I have commissioned no less than FOUR different artists, talented ones, to do this pic and they've all given up. I don't blame them, people understandably flake out a LOT on my bizarro character designs, but... Dammit, I want this.

I'll put forth the money (I can go up to $40?) but an artist rec would be so groovy

Oh, and @acetone_kitten and @green -- what would you like to do about our postponed get-together? We'd talked about Monday (i.e. tomorrow)-- I am definitely well enough to do that, especially if we're still meeting down here in the UD, but I'm flexible!

Still got some remaining jibblies from that dream last night and a host of remaining interpersonal worries, but you know... I'm pretty good. Have binged nearly the entire series of Amazing Adventures of Gumball, and cleaned up almost all traces of the barbaric lifestyle I was living while I Peg was gone. XD

Now I'm sitting here debating whether to wait on the chili in the slow cooker, or go out and reward myself for all this hard work with a burger from the Ave.

As a matter of fact, let's just come right out and admit it:

Rawr.

@anthracite (In case you were curious, it's my signature Santa Fe white chili with chicken, tomatillos, Hatch chiles, and garlic. I'd share, but in the immortal words of Alice Trillin, "There isn't much, you know." >_< )

Surely fullness and gluttony shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the YMCA's weight room forever, lest @anthracite gobble me up when you're not looking.

Hestia is my co-pilot; I shall not starve.

She maketh me to shop at TJ's: she leadeth me beside the slow cooker.

She restoreth my stomach: she leadeth me in the paths of foodcrime for her name's sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of sodium, I will fear no infarction: for thou art with me; thy spoon and thy fork, they comfort me.

Thou preparest a plate before me in an apartment devoid of confusing friends: thou anointest my pork with oil; my cooker steameth over.

Was back in college... yet again. Was having housing issues... yet again. Accidentally pulled some girl's hair while trying to find the stairs to my tiny new room, and when I went back to apologize she was amazed.

Apparently I had gotten a reputation around school as a complete unlovable asshole and had never known it. I wish I'd woken up right then and there, but I had plenty of time to slouch around campus kicking myself and wondering how the hell to reset my life.

Dammit.

Did one of you jokers mess with the entropy settings? Things are feeling distinctly more samey and futile than usual this morning. :p

I TOLD you kids to leave those universe controls alone! They're not a toy! Your mom and I work hard to keep Planck's constant at 6.626176 x 10^-34 joule-seconds and provide you a stable milieu for atomic nuclei. -__-

I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed. I was really hoping to transfer a lot of heat from one place to another today.

#moodsnapshot https://awoo.space/media/Bp_Q9WwSFwLZ9GlFh9o