Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Thai_dishes

Reading this article was a terrible, terrible mistake. I'm tempted to bribe one of you in a real city to pack some phat phrik khing in dry ice and FedEx it to me overnight. >_<

(Preference will be given to people from cities that will actually serve spicy food to Caucasians, i.e. not Seattle. ;p )

I could absolutely fucking murder a Thai curry right now.

This is absolutely not going to happen unless I drive much further than any civilized human being should ever have to drive for a measly gaeng phed gai. Fuckin' Ohio. >_<

(*Zero actual sympathy is expected, especially since there's like 67 lbs. of homemade gnocchi in the fridge. 🐯​)

https://i.imgur.com/feyRTnq.gifv

Oh, sure. She thinks it's funny now. But this is EXACTLY how the Crisis on Infinite Earths started.

UPDATE:

He had another go at me, with some deeply disingenuous tactics and an unironic use of "sheep" as a pejorative(!), despite me telling him in no uncertain terms our conversation was over.

I had no choice. He forced my hand. I told him he was just down to "winter."

"Have winter," I wished him, quite sincerely. :>

In 50 years, we're not going to be calling all this "Trumpgate." We're going to be calling Watergate "Nix-A-Lago," after the worst scandal in US history. Nixon will be remembered as "Individual Zero."

Okay, maybe not, but the point stands. :) This is turning out to be so much worse than a "mere" office burglary...

Yeah, I have to drink* for this one. Especially the dress.

https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlysatisfying/comments/a7sju0/balloons_creator/

*For those who don't know me in RL, this is a reference to the "Raggedy Ann and Andy Drinking Game" @anthracite introduced me to. You watch a movie, preferably the eponymous one, and every time one of your kinks gets referenced on-screen... you drink. You drink _regardless_ of whether the specific instance on screen arouses you, or is even pleasant. (e.g., if you have a feeder fetish... you gotta drink for the egg contest in Cool Hand Luke, even though there's nothing sexy about it in the least)

So "I have to drink for this" is basically personal slang for "this is embarrassingly close to my kink territory."

Is "they look like they have a great spirit" West Coastal for "well, bless your little heart?" (Which is, of course, Southerner for "you pitiable subhuman beast.")

So I was joking around about Trump with some decent folks on Reddit, and made a wisecrack about Hillary turning out to be Individual-1. Then we speculated on whether there might be a conservative out there so delusional they believe that.

Yup. Ninety Google seconds later. PiperOhio@Birdsite. "You’ve got nothing. The President is cleared since Individual 1 is Hillary Clinton." This was *not* satire in any visible context.

Granted, she's a blatant propaganda account, but someone (in Moscow?) either believed this was a tenable position, or has way too much faith in the political power of obfuscating stupidity.

I'm not really following MLP:FIM anymore, but it would still be really nice to look at happy Equestrians without feeling a vaguely icky, corrupt, polluted pariah-like sensation.

And that's not just the changeling in me talking. For her part, Schadi is just glad she licked the ceiling that one time. You-Know-Who will NEVER be able to get rid of all the ponybug DNA. -_-

One of these days one of the "THERE ARE ONLY TWO GENDERS" crowd is going to take a German class, find three of them, and promptly die from Unwanted Satori Syndrome.

Shrews do some real Stephen King shit... *shudder*

For the record, the guy mentioned in the above toot responded to me with a really, really stupid counterargument. He said "check your local library"-- as if his point were so self-evident, reading ANY book would support it, I guess?! (He was arguing that the basic purpose of the police is to protect society. His previous argument was "it MUST be true-- they swear an OATH to that effect!")

So I told him I was going to have to redact my blessing to just "winter holidays." O:)

It's pretty hilarious, the amount of intellectual contortion that Biblical scholars go through to convince themselves Song of Solomon 5:4 isn't about getting fisted.

my trollface when i deliberately sign off a parting shot to an arch-conservative with "happy winter holidays" :D

okay motherfucker i'm just gonna ruin your christmas with my rootless cosmopolitanism then

Mom launched into a 20-minute tirade, imho correctly, about how shitty my redneck stepfamily is (except for my stepbrother and stepdad, who are definitely still Ohio Guys, but genuinely really nice Ohio Guys).

I'm still laughing, especially about the part where she found out they were all exploiting my stepgrandfather's property, and she got to cancel their car insurance and electricity out from under them. It's a long story why Mom had control of them in the first place (keyword: "extreme ingratitude for tremendous emotional labor"), but she got off scot-free because they honestly thought they were ripping Grandpa off in secret.

I think I must have used the phrase "don't exactly see me playing devil's advocate here" about six times during our conversation. :)

Any day where the pro-Trump propaganda list I hate-read says "it's not looking good" is a fine day for democracy. :D

That moment you realize that your old neurological issues have NOT in fact come home to roost. You just haven't fucking eaten in roughly 18 hours because air travel totally mongs up your sense of routine.

I wish all my issues could be resolved with a huge bowl of Italian Wedding Soup.

(Fun fact: This stuff was never served at weddings until long after it was named. It's derived from "minestra maritata," where "maritata" [married] is just a metaphor for "mixed.")

My stepgrandfather has landed himself in the ER with a nasty, ulcerated case of colitis. He's 95. We are worried that if they have to perform surgery on him, he won't make it.

But it's not nearly as bad as it sounds. One, we're not really close. Two, he's been a macho twit about this condition for, like, 20 years. Three, he pretty much rebuffed all my mom's offers to help take care of him, in favor of his Favorite Granddaughter, who... is neither half as smart nor half as devoted as my mom. Four... he's kind of a reactionary crypto-racist asshole (and most likely was a Trump voter), though he's at least been nice enough to me.

This is mainly a matter of "shit, I hope he doesn't die over the holidays and break my stepdad's heart." His odds of making it are even pretty good so far. Surgery is just one scary possibility thus far. Frankly, to me, it's just One More Goddamn Thing, and one more reason to fret over my poor stepdad-- whom I *do* really like, and does not need this shit.

I love Anthracite so very much, but being able to work in complete and utter privacy and silence, without a distractible (albeit adorable) bohemian loon 10' away... That's feelin' pretty luxurious right now. :D

Living with Anthy again has been really good, better than I ever anticipated. But there are days I am seriously tempted to see how expensive, say, a decommissioned portapotty would be to set up in our living room. Something with enough room for a desktop shelf. Ideally, something that is perfectly soundproof.

OTOH, it is a fucking MIRACLE and speaks to how good Anthy is to me that I can even work with another sapient being in social-radar range at all...