Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

Evaluation months make me feel like the Inspector Javert of the Mumbai Global Information Systems set. Curse me for being so good at turning up these poor kids' mistakes. -_-

Recuperating and ruminating a lot. Mostly okay, but still getting the occasional wave of sadness and regret, and the occasional urge to make sad kitty noises at the world in general. In the absence of powerful veterinary anesthetics am instead binging The Office (US).

Also feeling a bit bad about skipping the big counterprotest today, but... well, it's complicated and involves a whole lot of personal and philosophical issues. Best of luck to all who are attending, and please be safe.

Aaand just as I sit down to polish off the last of my workweek, start the weekend, and recuperate, I remember our entire work system's shut down for the day.

This is so trivial. Basically, I work Saturday and take today off. But it costs a whole Action Point to switch from Work Mode to Creative Mode these days, and I've got some nasty AP-draining status conditions.

Thank goodness I've got a full liter of cold-brewed mana potion and a half-ounce of, um, Phoenix Down. O:)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBfnOtiJOWw #moodsnapshot #iasip

Spending $200 of your disposable income on a jumpsuit as a Marxist statement, because it offers an ineffectual "gotcha" to a right-wing celebrity, has got to be the most BoingBoing thing I've ever seen. This is the dumbest political activism since the Proud Boys bought Keurigs just to smash them.

https://boingboing.net/2018/02/09/unbifurcated-garments.html

if you want to imagine the future, imagine a candle in the window on a cold dark winter's night... FOREVER

Contrary to my recent posts... I know there is no hope, because "I Can't Fight This Feeling Any Longer" by REO Speedwagon just came on the cafe PA system, and if inhumanity like that can still exist in this world, we can have no future.

Saved from a pretty scary mood crash by timely conversations with several friends. I'm glad I had the sense to ask, I really hope I didn't impose too badly on anyone, and I am *incredibly* grateful to have you around.

The three best things in my life right now are work, an insane snarling dragoness who bites me (a lot), and two blobs of talking fungus*. Just what in the fuck.

*i.e., Kurt and Noah from Parallax (Red), admittedly two very charming little blobs of talking fungus

Still rolling this idea around.

You know what'd be neat? Grounds of a 1930s carnival that just closed. A *comedy*, for fuck's sake. Maybe kind of a Music Man/Marge Vs. The Monorail story, a big farce, where you discover all the foibles and dirty laundry of the townspeople by rooting in the shambles, and find out what comical series of misunderstandings and little personal follies wrecked the place.

Anything but death metaphors. FFS. >_<

Meanwhile, am binging on classic SNL. The current sketch is about Nixon at Watergate, and somehow it's really reassuring, especially the references to *his* lying and scapegoating.

This too shall pass. We might have to help it along, but it'll pass.

Haruki Murakami on clickbait and post-capitalism... IN 1994.

http://www.uncomfortablemoments.com/2010/05/cultural-snow.html

Largely succeeded in goal of naps, TV, and video games today. Tomorrow's going to be a long day, but I'm up for it, I think.

Still turning things over in my head, wondering which of the things I said pushed this past the point of reconciliation, still sorting out how much was me and how much was them. I'll be doing this for a while.

But I'm stable. I don't want drama, I know them well enough to know they just want peace too, so... it's just a matter of staying distracted.

If one more of these motherfucking games turns out to be an extended ham-fisted metaphor for death, I swear to god, I am going to crowdfund them a second theme to play with myself. Why can't we have more indie games set on a mysterious island where a nameless traveler just... discovers a bunch of wonderful things and has a poignant encounter with something supernatural that doesn't stand for anything Very Profound at all, it just is?

We can't be caught and
Can't stay here while
Guilt sets in with
Night's cool chill

--American Analog Set, "A Good Friend Is Always Around"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN2apEd2-9o

Hopes pretending. It's timber on the fire
Embers free the cinders
And send them ever higher
I dreamed I saw you
When you're old and tired
Afraid to move your hands
And expose the wires
We can't be caught and
Can't stay here with
Heat close by and
Your insides spilled
And do your friends know the way to go
When they leave your hands
The chamber's empty glow
It's a lonely ending
When your heart's grown cold
The kid is bored pretending
Now you'll never grow old
...

I've lapsed back into the Filmation cartoons. Clearly, my condition is worsening. Either that, or my muse is guiding me to work on that pitch for a gritty urban-fantasy reboot of Fraidy Cat.

#HopingICanGetCharlieBrookerAsFraidy

Currently watching game shows from the 1970s on Youtube. It is the closest thing to cryogenic suspension I can get with available technology. It is also the closest thing to a noble self-banishment to Limbo I can get with available theodicy. It is exactly like David Byrne's description of Heaven, and if I don't leave it in two or three days, I might have to ask as many of you as possible to physically abduct me and take me to a sleazy diner at 4 am for the sake of my own remnant soul. 😐​