bad mh day, meds
........so like..... are SSRIs supposed to make everything numb and intensify the apathy? Been on a low dose of Fluoexetine and it just seems to blur life?
Been trying to push though? Like it's harder to pull out of shitty moods, but maintaining a bland "eh" mood is easier?
re: bad mh day, meds
@AzureHusky yeah... I dunno. Robotic doesn't really fit? Kinda like like... emotions are de-saturated a bit?
Should have had an appointment to talk about it on monday. Doctor cancelled. Still haven't found the spoons to make the 3 minute phonecall to book a new one :/
re: bad mh day, meds
@Draekos yeah its worth talking to them when they're able. I had some make me feel robotic, some like I was feeling everything through a fog, one that made me MORE anxious... Doctors don't prepare ppl enough for the fact that it may take several tries to find a good one
re: bad mh day, meds
@AzureHusky I mean, he mentioned it, but trying to talk to him to try a new one hasn't really happened.
re: bad mh day, meds
@Draekos I'm sorry. I hope you can find the energy to call him for a new appointment soon.
bad mh day, meds
@Draekos yes, ssris make your mood stay at meh, which is way better than constant fukken void devouring you inside, imho
did you just start? it takesa while to get accustomed
re: bad mh day, meds
@efi it's been about 2 months?
re: bad mh day, meds
@Draekos that's about the time it took me to stop locking my jaw
it took a year before I could use my garbage consistently
I don't know when it started to get me consistently ok instead of meh, but it took several months
the starting months are rough, but after you can take higher doses, due to tolerance, the meh starts being more manageable and less imposed meh
re: bad mh day, meds
@efi ........oh boy, can't wait.
re: bad mh day, meds
@Draekos depression is a fuck
I'd hate it if I wasn't on meds haha
...
I'd be dead without the meds, more likely, so
re: bad mh day, meds
@efi yeah I getcha. Kinda... Kinda having a lot of those sort of thoughts right now? <_<; not a good day in my skull right now.
re: bad mh day, meds
@Draekos being in love helps a lot with depression, tho~~
:* <3
re: bad mh day, meds
@efi no. no it doesn't. Just makes me feel more broken because everything about the life I live should mean I don't feel this way but I still do.
Being outside of a relationship helped for a while.
re: bad mh day, meds
@Draekos oh, I see...
I mean, it helped me when I had gay kisses, that made me feel good...
anyway, if you need a hug or a million I'm here for you, just ask <3
bad mh day, meds
@Draekos That sounds about like where I was on Fluoxetine. Everything was dampened - my lows weren’t quite as low but my highs were shaved down too and everything just felt all flat and sensationless without any emotional range attached.
I juggled a few more before finally slipping off of SSRIs entirely; been more focusing on mindfulness therapy.
bad mh day, meds
@Draekos MASSIVE DISCLAIMER: I have never taken antidepressants outside of hormones. I have been living with someone who's taken several different antidepressants over a period of nineteen years.
My observation has been that SSRIs generally work by flattening all affect across the board. The lows become less crippling, but the highs become less heady and satisfying. Also, different SSRIs can "normalize" to different levels depending on personal biology and circumstance.
bad mh day, meds
@Draekos I admit I'm very biased against SSRIs, but I generally find that most people do not have the best luck with them vs their side effect profile.
Was any consideration given to welbutrin? It's a NRDI IIRC
bad mh day, meds
@Draekos depends on the SSRI. They're extremely hit or miss and it may take trying several to find one that feels right. I found I didn't like the ones that made me feel so dampened I felt kind of robotic