-, vague
It’s been several years now, and I still don’t know how I should have handled The Falling Out. I also still don’t know what I could have done better, other than to have cut and run sooner and more quietly, instead of trying to save friendships with people I care about.
I wish I hadn’t had to flee my community to prevent it from fracturing. I wish I hadn’t been a target. And I wish people understood how damn hard that is, when it seemed best to keep people happy.
-, vague
Most of all, I don’t think this should have been my sacrifice to bear. The fact it was and still is is why I’ve pulled back so hard from communities I care about, and I’m still struggling with the damage that’s done to me.
The cost of community harmony should not be annihilation and exile. I know I tried to be stoic in the face of all that, but I still feel and hurt and bleed like anyone else.
Be better, and be good to one another, okay? Don’t do this to anyone else. Please.
-, vague
And to be clear: I’m not going anywhere. I just need that out of my system, which is I guess a normal thing for me now.
I’m otherwise doing okay, but I wish I didn’t still have this in my headspace. And I wish it weren’t my brain’s self-preservation instincts keeping it lodged there.
re: -, vague
@zetasyanthis Thank you so much. ;..;
re: -, vague
@Goldkin *sending you hugs re: this* >.<