absolute shitpost, 🐯​, cw: intentionally misordered footnotes 

My name is Rezeya Montecore-Saint-Hobbes, tiger millionaire. I own*** a planet** and a space yacht*.

* currently at the bottom of Lake Michigan; mistakes were made; i blame @anthracite and @acetone_kitten

**Mars; not currently at the bottom of Lake MIchigan

***disputed

re: absolute shitpost, 🐯​, cw: intentionally misordered footnotes 

@zebratron2084 @anthracite @acetone_kitten

...I, uh. I have some bad news. About the contents of Lake Michigan.

re: absolute shitpost, 🐯​, cw: intentionally misordered footnotes 

@Soreth @anthracite @acetone_kitten Hun, I'm from Cleveland. OUR RIVER CAUGHT FIRE. Do you really think you have the capacity to surprise me here? Hell, I'm looking forward to hearing something finally took out the zebra mussels. 🤷​

re: absolute shitpost, 🐯​, cw: intentionally misordered footnotes 

@zebratron2084 @anthracite @acetone_kitten No, no, the mussels are fine.

It's just that Mars is in it now.

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