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PSA: Together, CH751 and C415A keys open half the indoor locks in America. Buy one of each, put em on your keyring. Definitely do not use them to break into bathrooms in places that require you to buy something. That would be illegal 😊

THUMP ting ting
THUMP ting ting

* Mako voice* Surely was there ancient sorcery in that iron crown they found, for when they placed it upon his troubled brow, he began to dance around. Lo, Frosty the Snowman was conjured unto hideous unlife! My lord’s people were no more. His was a sorrowful lot!

The real war on Christmas happened in the 1600s, and we already lost, since Christmas is no longer about getting drunk, dressing up like an obscene pantomime horse, and making fun of the church. This is of course the true meaning of Christmas.

[sees a cop] disgusting. they shouldnt be out in public. how am i supposed to explain that to my kids

Mastodon privacy PSA: locked posts and locked accounts (173 words plus image descriptions) 

I have seen this catch out more than one person, so here's how it works:

- The "follower-only" on 🔒 posts means *everyone who follows you*, not (per "Friends-only" on Livejournal) everyone *you* follow. Any rando who follows you can see all your private posts going forward.

- If you want to restrict who can see your follower-only posts in a vanilla Mastodon instance, right now the only available tool is restricting who can follow you, period:
+ In the "Edit profile" settings screen, there is a "Lock account" checkbox (see image one). If you tick that, whenever someone tries to follow you, instead of immediately following, they will show up in the "👥 Follow requests" column linked from the "Getting started" column. (You can also get email notifications - see image two.)
+ If you block someone, they will not be allowed to follow you and be removed from your list of followers. You can also soft-block someone - block and immediately unblock - to remove them from your followers without permanently blocking them.

Luxembourg politics, public transportation (+, boost with CW) 

Via mastodon.social/@xuv/101200142
----
" #Luxembourg is set to become the first country in the world to make all its public transport free.

Fares on trains, trams and buses will be lifted next summer [...]"

theguardian.com/world/2018/dec

This is great. I hope other large cities will follow. But they also will have to remove the incentive for companies to give a car to their employees instead of a salary.

I hereby propose that the opposite of a milkshake duck is a sonicfox

[ Watching the Rankin/Bass 'Year Without A Santa Claus', as Santa talks about 'by my charts and maps', and they show one of his maps of the Earth.]

Me: Ah, so Santa goes for the Mercator projection, I see. Interesting choice. Going for a projection with exactly two points it can't possibly show, one of which is HIS BASE OF OPERATIONS.

Comfort in level:
Taking off jeans
Putting on pyjamas
unfurling tentacles
letting your jaw relax in it's natural resting place
shredding skin to reveal six wings and ribbons of eyes too bright for humans to look at
taking off bra

"Welcome to Magic School. Here is your schedule."
"Thanks! But..."
"Yes?"
"This is just 'Ethics' and 'Human rights' and things like that."
"Correct, that's the first year curriculum."
"Do we have to learn all this?"
"Of course! What do you think this is, software engineering?"
#MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

There was an ambitious project called Xanadu that was a sort of alternate Internet, which worked more like a database, with this incredibly robust method for interlinking pages, citing them and attaching metadata about their histories of being edited. Feel free to screen cap this fun fact and share it on other social media or Reddit.

Writing prompt! (CW:Spiders, death) 

Each person swallows 28 spiders before they die. If you've only swallowed 3 so far, 25 show up before you die.

Hospitals make sure only non-toxic species live in the building. Families bring spiders to hospice to honor last wishes. The number of spiders that show up is taken as a sign of how open your heart and mind were in life, the lower, the better.

Just before you pass, you feel a tickle in the back of your throat, and a single spider crawls out of your mouth, sits on your lap, looks right into your eyes and says:

"you wouldn't download a" trivia (cw: sketchy business practices) 

wired.co.uk/article/dutch-righ

Hollywood-funded anti-piracy association Brein, the people who made the "you wouldn't download a car" ad, tried to stiff Melchior Rietveldt, the musician who composed the music for it, out of the vast bulk of his royalties. They told him the ad would only be shown at a local film festival, then stuck the ad on a bunch of DVDs and acted like they had full right to.

So, like, if you're ever wondering if anti-piracy capitalists hate piracy? The answer is "no". They'll steal and lie seven days a week and twice on Sundays. They just hate seeing people enjoy media without paying them.

ACA, US pol 

Trump killed the marketing budget for the ACA and changed the enrollment deadline.

You have until Dec 15th to get covered, even with pre-existing conditions.

Don't wait.

t.co/qMJsC3POpl

Professional design software woes. 

I know it's not a world record, but there's something almost exhilirating about discovering a repeatable crash-inducing bug in Adobe Illustrator CC 2019 before noon.

Oh, the steps to reproduce?
• Draw a hexagon.
• Try to rotate it.

I guess today is a no-hexagons day!

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