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You know dude it’s been established that you don’t have to SAY “pew pew pew” to use your optic ray. This is like that part in Ep II with the droid factory, except I could figure out what was going on in Ep II.

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Robots don’t work that way, magnetism doesn’t work that way, coherent stories don’t work that way. Also; this would have been the best movie ever made when I was 10.

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The fuck, that’s the antivirus? What did they program it in, COBOL? But now Betacron has gone to hang out in the clouds with Mufasa or something

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Dude everyone ELSE gets gunk from the thrift store glued all over them but not Rhea, that’s sexist! But hey sexy Gonk Droid!

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Making this movie must’ve required spending at LEAST as much on silver spray paint and gunk from the thrift store as they did on weed

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Now watching The Killer Robots Crash and Burn. One of our titular heroes has egg whisks for pauldrons.

TRAPPED IN VANCOUVER
NOT ESPECIALLY SURROUNDED BY EVIL
NOT PARTICULARLY LOW ON GAS

I’m not sure why I’m apparently the best person EVAR to this enthusiastic pit bull but I would kinda like my feet not stepped on, my crotch not nosebonked at high speed, and my belly/ass not clawed to fuck by rearing up.

“I named them after my favorite ukiyo-e artists! UTAMARO…”
*brandishes a sabre* “Oui!”
“HIROSHIGE!”
*rapier and main gauche* “Mais oui!”
“HOKUSAI!”
*steps forward, basket hilt broadsword at the ready* “j’attends!”
“… and KUNIYOSHI!”
*spins cane* “kowabunga!”

And then they MUTATED from the OOZE but someone used up all the Renaissance artists so I named MY team of turtles after my favorite 20th century artists!

CALDER!
MIRO!
POLLACK!
and HARING!

“Kowabunga, dude!”

Kid me: look at Model Railroader, I wonder how people in the Midwest can have giant layouts like this?

Old burned out me looking at my friend’s photos of HER friends’ place in OH; let’s see I could have multiple big hobbies or my most expensive hobby could be living in Seattle

Takeaways;
* not everyone who seems to need help actually needs help.
* This is because not everyone who looks like they need help are my mother or grandmother and automatically I will be a terrible person if I don’t immediately hop to it.
* on the contrary a neuroatypical person may need personal space and a sense of their own agency more than whatever I think I’m required to do.

Oops.

Woo hoo! Xiphorous had the opportunity to join the Bone Gnawers or the Children of Gaia, but is now an *andros* of the Black Furies. One of the few they have. And returned after learning mysteries from Fury elders in Oregon. Xi has his pack, he still doesn’t necessarily *trust* the Furies, and moussaka gets less appealing as dinner after three days.

I’d ask myself but I’m shitty to date, not worth it, and I know this.

Soothing music inspired by and mixed with wolf howls

because soothing music inspired by and mixed with fox screaming doesn’t really work

oh yeah, my favorite Jethro Tull album, "Dude, I'm So Stoned, Does Anyone Else Want Tacos?" featuring such classic tracks as "Another Train Song," "Wistful About Britain's Agrarian Past," and "I'm Far Too Clever By Half."

so I'm sitting on the toilet reading the rogue section of Xanathar's Guide to Everything when I remember something I really like in the D&D movie were there were Bigby's Hand spells, and wow it'd be nice to watch the D&D movie again. Then I realize that I saw that *last* Sunday and not in fact several weeks ago.

Image, fantasy creatures, eye contact 

this morning, some evildoers! Demonic graft wizard, paladin of tyranny, halfling master thief, werewolf priest of Malar.

mh, journaling 

It takes a while for neurochemicals to clear from my brain, and consequently if I get hit frequently or intensely enough, I just won't have resources to defuse negative feelings. Worse, because my brain picks up on similarities between situations and thinks of terrible scenarios to try to avoid them, I can easily make my own situation worse by adding more to the pile of anxieties and upsets. Which in turn means more time that I'm more open to anxiety and upset, it can cycle worse and worse.

And it was this way for years and years, so there's an element of familiarity to push back against as well. And this is before we even start talking about all the self hate I had for years on top of this as a way of distracting me, explaining the situation with something familiar and stuff I'd been told, and directing anger inwards where it'd be harder to spot.

So easy to get caught up in feedback loops which play right into where I literally have brain damage from trauma, way more than what's actually going on and where my situation now isn't as bad.

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