Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

so I managed to make it through the last 12+ hours with my mood recovering, very broken sleep, and acid reflux, but now I need to shower and go in and I'm getting all those feelings from my last job again, that I'll go in and officially I can't get anything right and I'll just have to steep in it for hours.

Okay. I stayed 15 extra to create email and a new sales order to fix my mistake. I checked in with my boss before leaving and deleted recent posts here where I probably was way out of line. Heading home; my plan is to shower, veg online and try not to harm self or smart, so I ‘lol likely be on later

Please do keep making me feel like a fuck up. I’m sure this will result in me not fucking up, rather than full on suicidal depression and wanting to walk off the job

Do you count as an incel if you’ve stopped looking b/c you’re sure you’d fuck up and aren’t good enough, or do you need a sword from the mall?

Question; if I feel like my coworkers are critical yet un-encouraging in ways that hammer on my issues, what are my chances that

1) their communication style *is* discouraging, and would be discouraging to someone without my issues?

2) I’m imagining the situation as worse than it is thanks to catastrophizing and verbal/emotional abuse as the follow up to pointing out mistakes in both my childhood and this past year?

3) both?

Fuck it why do I try when I just fuck up anyway?

A thing I’ve heard about BP is there’s an end where he visits East Bay and talks about STEM education and that Disney is giving some of that money to STEM education here.

Bugs me. Oaklanders need rent control, better transit options, and pigs who can’t get away with shooting the kids, not the 2018 version of Stay in School, Don’t Do Drugs. You don’t offer up some nice icing and say you’re giving people a cake, let alone you try to pass it off as an entire meal.

hot take; I can't imagine it actually being much fun to stay at the Y! M! C! A!

The people won't be people when they eat a sandwich!

Managed to not sink into self hate. Currently treating myself to listening to Yes on the bus home.

I take refuge in the Buddha
I take refuge in the dharma
I take refuge in the sangha

If my coworkers are trying to convince me I want this job to end in mid March they’re doing a damn good job of it today

With all the emphasis on Wakanda, I would like to point out there *is* a real life African country with pretty solid though not fantastic tech, which successfully resisted repeated European attempts to take over until the Italians literally rolled in with tanks and fairly advanced aircraft.

I feel like generating #tmi for #tmituesday, ask me stuff if you want?

called Senators, called rep, this accomplishes nothing, I’m so tired of being a good little Boy Scout. It’s stacking badly with other stress today.

It's amazing how much better I feel when I close Twitter. It's like the parable about the samurai asking the monk to define heaven and hell, only with more cat photos.

one of those times where if I could have any fantasy come true for a little bit, any at all, I would have difficulty choosing between being warm and loved and cuddled for hours on end, my version of kinky weird sex (which is probably pretty vanilla), and just getting to hang out in Powell's and drink coffee and draw.

twitter content, but the good kind 💙​💙​💙​

https://twitter.com/Spectrum_Shift/status/967866675612676096

WOW telling me "Sounds like your letting stuff linger instead of moving past them" is about as sympathetic as something my parents would tell me, and it makes me both pissed off and self-hating.

"I will kill any tax legislation that benefits @Delta unless the company changes its position and fully reinstates its relationship with @NRA," Lieutenant Governor Casey Cagle, a Republican, wrote on Twitter. "Corporations cannot attack conservatives and expect us not to fight back."

Ah yes Georgia. Fucking Georgia. I'm gonna be dying in the 2070s and it'll be the same bullshit as when I was a kid, as when my family first got here. FUCK that fucking state.