Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

I just told a teenager online "if your parents aren't incredibly proud of you, they *should* be!" and I now worry that was a *terrible* thing to say.

Skype interview for 30 minutes, responded to a couple of emails to apply for jobs, and found out this one video interview thing a potential agency wants only works in Chrome. Calling it time for a break, eating breakfast.

"You're like an evil Mister Rogers." #MovieQuotes

I reiterate my contention that they/them would be nice as surface level, basic interaction pronouns.

Eg: am I a nonbinary genderqueer artist, or a aging male blue-collar with no interest in transitioning? Right now I'm drinking coffee and prepping for an interview, and neither of those things is especially gendered, why do they need very gendered pronouns?

actually, this is the first time I've seen interviews with Peterson himself in any form, and, although I'm biased coming in and this has been curated, he really comes across as off. He's a little TOO much someone trying to sell me a messiah or a used BMW I can't afford.

there's some joke here about Germans and Dene coming together to create the world's longest, most carefully defined nouns, but I don't think I'm smart enough to make it.

Rationally (ironically turns out to mean "emotional realizations from Buddhism and psychadelics") I know that process is cumulative, can be very inconsistently episodic and that there's no instant cure for everything.

Irrationally I still buy into lots of old dogma (storm the gates of heaven in my 20s or never, quick fix solutions to complex questions, etc) and I'm pretty sure dogmatism is a short term survival technique which eats energy to actually look for different long term solutions.

Ugh. Weird mood stuff towards the end of last night, then my GI tract decides it ain't happy, and even more weird self-doubt sinks in.

Fantasizing about existence being a toggle switch, where suddenly a single thing means my life is happier forever, fits into a whole batch of fantasies; having some of my 20s back, being adopted into my forever home (I used to work animal rescue, the phrasing really does describe these wants), suddenly landing some great opportunity doing art for bucks.

“Aliens and Hermaphrodites, my favorite tabletop rpg!”

Apparently I’ve sung Zappa’s “Why Does It Hurt When I Pee?” often enough that my Zappa-hating housemate now remembers the refrain. COYOTE ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED!

Elon Musk explaining that he donated to Republican PACs so that they would listen to his POV about issues affecting humanity as a whole.

Only *after* feeling incredibly angry do I find the thought "oh God, he suggested resolving global climate change by building a Maglev line, didn't he?"

I don't usually get the ugh don't wanna move don't wanna leave the house variety depression but it's been bad the past 2-3 days. I guess "I cleaned a ton of communal space" is pretty good for being this depressed.

damnit I wanted to be an overturn-squad-cars-throw-rocks anarchist, not a volunteer-to-scrub-floors anarchist, maybe I need to rethink my personal politics.

I'm;

a) alive
b) dead
c) the stranger
d) whichever I choose it amounts to the same, absolutely nothing

I messed up and didn't make myself get out of the house early; I need to remember to set alarms especially when dealing with depression. I cancelled on movies with @Earthshine because that left me 6 hours to drive to south bay, do things, and drive back, which I didn't feel is enough time to do anything with.

So instead I prepped for tonight's dinner by cleaning the stovetop, bathtub, and kitchen/living room/bathroom floors. This leaves me a little time to draw later.

I wish I wanted compliments a lot less. I feel like I'm this endless sinkhole for praise - even with feeling accepted and wanted I can really *really* want compliments and kind words.

I worry that I'm being too needy and will alienate everyone (which is largely training) or dismissive (which is more sincere to who *I* am, I want my friends to be and to feel heard).

helloooo crap self- worth about artwork! I clearly need to either nap or start drawing soon.

and right *the* World Cup game is today which means my favorite remaining coffee shop here is out.

My brain decided I needed to hit body image issues in dreams, so right now I feel that I'm utterly revolting. But I did some cleaning, so now I feel like I'm hideous *and* own too many books.

hey @ElectricKeet check these guys out, I really like 'em

Songhoy Blues - Al Hassidi Terei (Official Video) https://youtu.be/KvGsV8Trl8o

https://youtu.be/xBujXJVBxNU