Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

Spam fried rice, used up the last guy lon and threw in some preserved vegetables.

Okay the dude whistling to himself in the next stall over, while I was taking a shit just now? That was kinda unsettling.

the big things I did with my day at least so far is I did an in-person interview and colored a #drawing

hot take; Dark City is a better film noir spoof than Who Framed Roger Rabbit because it has a Peter Lorre character

(Bladerunner isn't quite the same thing here, since the Peter Lorre analog is Gaff)

SO MANY THINGS TO THROW ON THE GROUND

LIKE THIS

AND THIS

AND THIS

AND EVEN THIS!

okay so apparently I'm listening to the first album again

ONE SIDED STORIES FOR YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS
I'M INFERIOR?
WHO'S INFERIOR?
YEAH YA BETTER CHECK THE INTERIOR OF THE SYSTEM
WHICH CARES ABOUT ONLY ONE CULTURE AND THAT
IS WHY WE GOTTA TAKE THE POWER BACK

MORTAL KOMBAT THEME TUNE: Brutality. Anomality. Fatality.

ME: Ignorance! Hypocrisy! Assimilation! The elite! All of which are American dreams! UNGH SHIT!

in the early 1990s Seattle was this half forgotten city in the woods where if you saw someone shaggy wearing plaid flannel you couldn't tell if they were a lesbian, a lumberjack, a werewolf, or some combination thereof

so there's this brand of smoked bacon and shelf stable sausage (and apparently a lot of other stuff), Hempler's.

and every time I see the brand name I think "it's like Hitler but for HEMP!"

*Riefenstahl looking footage*

"Wir brauchen mehres Lebensraum AUF DAS SOFA! DUUUDE, jemand andres moechten TACOS?"

*crosses arms, huge cheering*

now I'm trying to figure out conjugation for "bogarting the bong"

ich bogartiere, du bogartierst, er bogartiert

what really gets me about how Flash Gordon is Space RHPS is how it's NOT an exact map.

Like okay obviously Ming is Frankenfurter, Clytus is RiffRaff, Aura is Columbia, Dale is Janet, Zarkov is Dr. Scott. But Flash is Rocky, Voltan is Eddie, and Barin is actually Brad. This is weird enough without Richard O'Brien showing up as NOT the RiffRaff analog.

"Okay, let's go in after them."
"GOOD! THEY'RE COMING THROUGH! SQUADRON FOURTEEN, DIIIIVE!"

"SECOND WAVE! DIIIVE!"

"Stop all engines. Repel boarders."
"Hiero's hit! I'm going in after him!"
"IMPETUOUS BOY! OH WELL, WHO WANTS TO LIVE FOREVER? HA HA HA HA HA DIIIIVE!"

"Prince Barin! I'm not your enemy, Ming is, let's all team up and fight him!"
"Lower him into the swamp!"
#MovieQuote

#drawing today, a three stage character inspired by old Ral Partha/Citadel minis.

CLYTUS! Are your men on the right PILLS? Maybe you should execute their trainer!

"We the people of Ardentia! We have suffered since you blasted our kingdom! We can offer you nothing this year but our loyalty."
"Excellent. We prize nothing more than loyalty. Now tell Us, how great is this loyalty to your Emperor?"
"Without measure."
"We are delighted. Fall on your sword."
"Death to Ming!" *zotz*

Today, I'm noticing that I have this childhood training which affects how I respond to failure.

1) something happens which I don't want.

2) I've been trained that this is never just something that just kinda happens, or even that it feels worse because of poor sleep or not eating, but because of something I did wrong, typically being stupid, unable to focus, or not working hard enough

3) how other people are treated complicates this. Either I want what they want, which carries the implication they are innately better than me (or will always be innately luckier), OR it's not something they want, which implies I'm bad for wanting something a good person wouldn't want.

4) related, I feel completely alone; either I feel alone in wanting whatever, or I feel alone in washing out of whatever.

5) lastly I'm not supposed to have a negative reaction to this at all - I'm not supposed to be frustrated, sad, angry, or give up (unless it's something GOOD people wouldn't want). This is especially bad if the reason I failed was already my fault. And obviously I'm not supposed to be unhappy with being punished fairly (and it's always officially fair), so by now this compounds with the initial frustration and comparison to other people.

I’d packed my tablet and still had coffee so immediately after job hunting I flatted a couple of drawings. I’m nowhere near good at choosing colors, but it’s so different from any other art thing I do that it’s really fun for me. Depression’s still eating me, but a bit less now.

Worrying about Trump because he's having problems with senile dementia is like saying the danger of a nuclear exchange is that people affected by material carried by weather patterns are at higher risk for cancer.

let's listen to something other than NIN. I know. Schostakovich is pretty easier going while depressed.

* 3 minutes later *

DEATH

💀​

TO ALL THOSE WHO STAND IN THE WAY

OF FREEDOM FOR WORKING PEOPLE

the me that you know is now made out of WIRES
and even when I'm right with you
I'm so far away
I could try to get away
but I strap myself in
I can try to scratch away
the sound in my ears
I can see it killing away
all of my bad parts
I don't wanna listen
but it's all too clear

it won't give up it wants me dead
goddamn this noise inside my head