Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

Leave the check before you’re through
I’ve gotten nothing left to prove
If I die before I wake
Hope I don’t come back again
I’m dying
Even in his youth
Even in his youth
Yeah, yeah

*lights up*
*gets coffee from Tully’s or Seattle’s Best*
*skims the Men Seeking Men section of The Stranger*

And some truck owners are women, plus you figure at least someone’s gendered their truck female as well. Why don’t they make truck ovaries?

The crushing self-hate I lived with for decades existed, in part, as a way to cope with and redirect being profoundly angry at my world. So ironically now that I’m saner and happier, I’m also MUCH angrier at places where I feel powerless or attacked, MUCH more often, and it’s pretty uncomfortable.

theoretically I should be so tired that I fall in bed and stay there through the morning but anxiety

WHAT KIND OF VIBE DO I GIVE OFF?

🔴 magical beast

🟠 construct

🟡 outsider

🟢 plant

🔵 undead

🟣 aberration

A toddler having the sort of meltdown so loudly and with such crystal clarity that her mother WOULD race out and sign her up for every voice class ever, IF the mother in question were not very distracted by a toddler having an epic meltdown.

how “dark” and perfectly clean furry art alternates with all the horniness in furry is a lot like if you could march with the Goths or the Sierra Club at Pride

Real sore leg posting hours

Who’s cramping up?

* puts on Maiden's "Aces High"

* presses throttle quadrant forward, pulls stick back

* levels out throttle quadrant, switches left hand to stick while right hand retracts landing gear

* shifts seat back, closes cockpit

* clicks guard off the trigger

* swaps to the "Supermarine" track from "Dunkirk"

ME 262 PRINCE OF TURBOJET
JU JUMO 004!

#subpost I know it's awesome that coyotes are tough, smart, and adaptive, but especially today I would like a coyote emblem with ADAPT on it to have the obverse stamped with ADAPTING SUCKS I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT

“Are you a bad enough dude to haul an air conditioner and a dining room table up 9 short flights of stairs etc etc?” The answer is “up to when it feels like there’ll never be cons etc again and the only thing in the future is more parents, tasks, heavy lifting and heat, and the sadness is TERRIBLE.”

TFW you’ve watched Monty Python enough that, despite being Jewish rather than C of E, the first lyrics associated with the cookbook title “Jerusalem” are “and did these feet in ancient times walk upon England’s mountains green?” instead of say “Yerushalayim shel zahav.”

You may be badass, but are you “haul a queen sized mattress up 9 short flights of stairs and through 2 hallways because the elevator is broken?” badass? Hint; the badassitude fades compared to how much this FUCKING SUCKED

I figured as long as I was really in a groove on moving apartments, I'd rent a U-haul and bust ass after work. That way even though it'd suck, moving furniture and boxes while things were cooling off would still be better than waiting until 10 AM for the U-haul place to be open and then moving in the middle of a very hot day. I STILL think it's a good theory.

My neighbor spots me finishing up moving nearly all my worldly possessions to the U-haul and offers to help out so I give him what I have on hand, $12, and this set of drawers which I'm not using but his kid might be able to use, thinking yeah, having another person is also a pretty good idea.

We show up at my new apartment complex and THE ELEVATOR IS NOT WORKING. My new apartment is on the 4th floor.

I move what furniture I have out of the rental truck to by the elevator, and leave it with a note saying hey, I am going to move this as soon as the elevator is working, call this number if there are problems. My neighbor, a new neighbor, and myself haul ALL THE FUCKING BOXES up the stairs to the 4th floor, where I can do the rest by myself much more easily.

I drop by Safeway with my neighbor, get another $20 for him (so I've paid him $32 total, I think I got off cheap tbh), drop him off, head back to the new place, get all the boxes down the hall into my new apartment, drop off the U-haul, and call it a day at midnight.

"I'm not stressed about this at all," they said at 1:40 while up thanks to being too hot and needing to poop, and suddenly felt chest pains which turned out to be acid reflux.

covered with shit is what you desire
mystical doorway swirled in the mire
we'll use the plunger if blockage won't budge
it's a gate to the Plane of Fudge!

ever since I found you, I still had to piss on the ground
now I know that I can use you, I gotta stop fucking around
if you need shit baby I got shit!
on this you can depend
I'll pump your hump! Your fuckin' stump!
my crappy crap-caked friend

THE PORTAL POTTY! A GIFT FROM THE GODS!
let us pay tribute and bury our wads
I think you know what it's all about
just jiggle the handle! Watch something come out!

the ultimate irony of a song about how much it sucks to be a blue collar being written by libertarians

have you all been good boys and girls? That's what I thought...

would you like to hear a little story?

animals came from miles around
so tired of walkin' so close to the ground
they needed a change, that's what they said
"life is better livin' on two legs"
but they were in for a big surprise
'cause they didn't know the Law.
AND THEN