I have a few things to get off my chest. I feel much more comfortable doing it here under warnings because at least I can feel easy that folks aren't forced to see every little bit of venting.

I'm incredibly tired of living in this area. This isn't new, but It's getting more pressing. By now I hoped I'd have a software job. I don't. I have a tech support position that I sorta enjoy but make internship money. It's frustrating but not all bad, but I have to do -something-...

I am in this torn-feeling situation in that... I like my friends here, I do. I had a steady sex and/or cuddling life before transitioning and now I am -starved- for physical attention on a regular basis. Since exploring myself more and transitioning (let along on species stuff) I've grown more distant from most everyone here.
It hurts, but perhaps it was inevitable.

It's sorta why the "I need to get out of here" admission has been so difficult for me. I have amazing support and I couldn't have gotten here without it... and here I am desiring so hard to leave and it feels... like abandonment, almost.
At the same time and other side, I worry that I've been romanticizing moving and the Seattle area. I'm secretly terrified that my own immense desires are secretly sabotaging my longer term plans and... IDK.