-> @oneironott@vulpine.club @Oneironott@awoo.space

I'm reminded of the term I heard re: living as trans... 'death by a thousand cuts'.
I've said on a few occasions "those who didn't know me before; I feel so much better now" and that's still true but to a lesser extent than what used to be.
"Before, I would be 'not depressed' two days out of every two weeks and not I'm 'depressed' two days out of every two weeks"
Now, on a good cycle it's maybe... half and half
which is better

but it begs asking...
"what the hell HAPPENED?"

Times are changing, and I feel like I've barely had time to process moving here. Rather, process the trauma I was leaving.
I wondered tonight "what happened to me?"
Specifically, I remember being much happier when i first started transitioning. It occurred to me that all those social shittiness I experienced of being a trans 'girl' in the midwest has possibly had its' tendrils in deeper than I thought, and has been fairly traumatic for me.

I feel so gorgeous

“You’re welcome to your opinions for the short time you’ll be human enough to have them” HUFF

watching That Batman Beyond Episode

Holy shit I AM CUTE

I seriously don’t know why this hasn’t occured to me on a deep level like this. I’m so completely different than i was. I look so different~ i look so much better than i thought i would look.

Oh yay we’re back
I missed y’all

TAILS ARE THE SEXIEST AND MOST WONDERFUL THING

MY TAIL IS BEAUTIFUL AND WONDERFUL

I WANT TO SMOOCH TAILS

I'M SO FUCKIN GAY FOR THICK TAILS AAAAAHHHH

🎶 Dysphoriaaaa

#nocontexttheatre what happens in the Umbra stays in the Umbra

drop me, warp me, control me @.@

It made me consider what i’d have to do to convince folks around me i was in a loop. It’s odd, but i almost feel the desire to establish some sort of code, idk.

I dreamt last night that i was stuck in a time loop.
So i… had the same dream over and over and over, but i was trying to figure out some way of quickly convincing someone that i was in a time loop.
Thing is, time was just frustrating enough that is changed certain patterns randomly so i could never quite predict what was going to happen. (Also dreamlogic, but my brain attributed it to that)

I’m exhausted waking up x.x but it was fascinating

Music is so ridiculously vivid

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gb3_4g1TsE
Now listening to this song and ARGGHHH it's just so perfect