Jessica @cat@awoo.space

every time I look up this chart there’s something new I crack up laughing at

today it’s at Brisbane calling a 200ml glass a “beer”

[me, having crossed my fingers behind my back] but I’d definitely have to do it in Adelaide so I only have to drink ¾ as much milk as anywhere else

Skyrim but every time the phrase “milk drinker” is invoked I drink an entire pint of milk

I don’t know how to convince you you don’t need to reply with how much data you do or do not have hoarded, it does not impress me that you have none, it does not impress me that you use the cloud, it does not impress me that you have more, please, this does not need your input

[very it’s free real estate voice] it’s a jokes

aaaaaaaa

tfw Siri directs you to walk to a jewellery shop in Vancouver, WA, USA rather than the much closer cafe in Vancouver, BC, Canada

Private again because twitter has no fucking chill

🤔

when the fireteam member who’s gone ahead tells you the game says vehicles aren’t permitted to be spawned where you’re going (feat. @MOOMANiBE@twitter.com)

update: LadyBattleCop is too long to be a battletag cmon blizzard what gives

shit though for real

that thing where “gifs” on twitter don’t have playback controls but “videos” do, despite both being transmitted as “video/mp4” is uh, sure something

so on a scale between 9 and 16 out of 10, how insecure do you think this thing will be?

we live in a society

wow i did not expect to find ADmINN here @dasharez0ne@twitter.com

hey uh asexual people are definitely welcome under the queer and LGBT umbrellas ok no further questions thank you and please fuck off if you disagree

I met my wife on Twitter but sincerely, Twitter is also fucking awful