🔶 KLCY AXIOM Prime @kelseyhusky@awoo.space

@Leucrotta again, reasonable conclusions to draw, based upon your descriptions of your experiences. I really hope you didn't get teased about them.

@Leucrotta yeah, sure!

@Leucrotta That's honestly pretty well-reasoned!

Tonight, I successfully downloaded, installed, and launched the UE4 Editor! And I added a bunch of free assets to use once I figure out what I'm doing!

Nothing on my schedule tonight. Think I'll start taking my first stabs at getting things setup and poking around inside UE4 tonight.

@jakebe Good lift, Safe landing, friend.

@Heffboom_Konijn The Red looks super awesome and that ref sheet is really pretty too! Profile updated!

@kobunny Heck yeah! Keep those shields up and the point defenses on high alert!

So, just from a cursory review of options, I think I'm going to switch from Godot to Unreal. There's a bigger library of free assets, and I'm going to need to use as much pre-existing work in order to get to prototype phase quickly. If it turns out I've got something actually worth showing to other people, THEN i can start looking for unique, purpose made assets. until then, its time to do what I usually do: Reuse, remix, repurpose.

I just saw my own custom loading message on a Slack and it buffed me a little bit.

@orrery No, I totally get that. And I agree with you. It is a personal and private struggle and my friends have been a great support that I wouldn't have made it this far without them. But struggling against my own inertia is a real bitch sometimes.

Whenever I have trouble describing the "huskybot" aesthetic, I will now point people toward this video. Amazing model work and exactly what I had in mind for the level of detail and style of detail. I can now say: "Like this, but with a husky head and two chest gems instead of just one."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BkluGReixUU&t=632s

@orrery Sticking with that metaphor then, today, I am unsure if knowing about the Matrix is good for me, if being connected or disconnected is good for me, and very unsure if my Matrix is the same as anyone else's.

What am I doing here? Why do I get existential exactly when I sit down in the RZ to work? This happens every damn Monday. Crawl off my bus downtown, zombie through the mo(u)rning standup, then grumble through security to sit and stare at a glowing rectangle all damn day.

I want to be trans with confidence. I want to feel like I'm making good moves for myself, instead of throwing my life at the wall to see what sticks. Being told no one else knows what they're doing doesn't help.

Tonight's mission: Get really, really, really fucking stoned. Double or triple taps on the vape-adapted bong at regular intervals. This is gonna be fun!

@pillowcat *continues touching* I feel great, though. Thank you.

@pillowcat cause i've been touching you all day, absorbing your energy to make myself grow stronger?

Its tiring being woke. Wanna curl back up on my recharge pad.