Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

A lovely walk adjacent to Bayou St. John... on the way home from my ENT telling me I STILL have fungal gunk in my ears... reminded me of the inescapable truth:

New Orleans is a magical shithole.

And in this day and age, not every shithole by far is magical, but any magic that still remains is gonna pretty much have to hide in a shithole.

So I'm glad I'm here.

(As for the ear, the prognosis is good and I sure feel a lot better. Gonna be pricey, but ain't that America. *shrug* )

Random bayou pic follows.

This comeback makes me smile like a Cheshire Cat every time I drop it on a transphobe.

oh look i have a new nickname for the proud boys

ACTION RECOMMENDED:

AVOID THE AIR

this DM to my ex just makes me smile is all n.n;

i'm so envious

i want ponycake

i wanna be ms. ponycake up there

this is definitely not a vore thing

this is definitely a pony thing

there was probably an embarrassingly recent day when i would have thought this was visionary genius, but me on the cusp of my 46th birthay is more like "ok my merry little prankster when is this gonna get anybody fed, housed, or cared for"

twice in a day

you can't imprison my heart, dorsey

i will devour your babies.

(still, i'm impressed that their algorithm can recognize "jump off a cliff" as a death wish...)

RON HOWARD: "Four minutes later, Rezy shanked the warden."

oh look it's my time in seattle except i was in my mid-30s

yay

*sigh*

behold:

princess artiemuss

(not pictured: lair; invisible jet; weather-control ray; satellite network; minions)

(each sold separately)

no seriously, why do people do this

it tells you everything you need to know about me and my damage that, on a day where i have a full to-do list, i spent 15 minutes painstakingly ensuring i had four suitably random emoji after the champagne bottle

it also tells you something that i spent another three minutes rewriting this post because i'd originally said "the four most random possible emoji" but realized that was probably not accurate. something deep inside me didn't want to mislead you into thinking i thought i'd objectively determined this.

i am proud of this and i mean every word >_____<

this will suffice until we have bullets and a clear aim

raccoon feels

it's late, i'm tired, i'm undercaffeinated, and my insults are getting kinda baroque as the evening wears on

still we must press forward

rafael cruz? rafael edward cruz? you're a jerk. a complete kneebiter.

(i'd offer apologies to hp lovecraft for cribbing his quote but the original is racist as shit and fuck that guy)

is it just me, or is this just a really badly written sentence? "bio-active drug containing a virus" scrapes up real close to "not even wrong" in my book

you know, not like those totally biologically inactive drugs-- i'd hate for people to turn into zombies over a placebo

shit, now i wanna see a horror movie where a placebo turns people into zombies

Doing a lot better this morning. Yeah, it was definitely bad brain chemistry.

Dragon helped a lot.

You helped a lot.

This crimebear helped a little so I'm sharing it. <3

I will never get tired of replying to threads where people try to compare black people to monkeys... by showing them pictures of _actual_ shaved chimps.

Yeah, just guess what color their skin is. White, white, white.

The best part? Pointing out, "You know, if you just gave this little guy a MAGA hat, a Bud, and a Marlboro, you'd have a dead ringer for your Uncle Dad."

Never fails to get an entertaining reaction.