Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

There's so much latent in this old photo of a Victorian couple trying not to burst out laughing during a portrait. Can you imagine how different *our* era will look, when there's nothing left but the semblances and the polite poses?

*dusty old Martian lady beats personal demons and depression-hounds with an ordinary household broom and sends them packing, then stands there shaking her fist out the doorway*

And stay out!

Any thought of the format, "How bad could it be? It's almost impossible to screw up $FOOD" is an inevitable path to sadness. Especially if you're already depression-binging and $FOOD is from Safeway.

@Leucrotta What, no Boo Berry: The Oblivion?! No Yummy Mummy: The Resurrection?

@001zlnv Well, shit. Wishing you all luck, hun.

@Leucrotta Since "octopus" actually derives from Greek, not Latin, it should be something more like Doctors Octopuses, or perhaps Doctors Octopodes. But since each Doctor is, themself, only one octopus, the ideal form would be simply "Doctors Octopus." However, I think you are entirely correct that "Doctor Octopuses" would be right out. Perhaps we can compromise on "Docs Oc?"</pedant>

I'll... I'll just show myself out. *blush*

Mood is holding steady. Supplies of holiday tequila and junk food are holding steady. Got a little down this morning due to Relationship Stuff and being a bit of empathy sponge off of Peg's winter depression, but it was nothing biscuits and gravy couldn't fix. Probably gonna work today and watch She-Ra. More Dragon Fashion Hour with Peg tonight. Life isn't good, exactly, but it's cozy, and it's better than the alternative?

Backing out again for now. Good luck, y'all.

Going dark for the holidays. See ya Saturday. Enjoy whatever it is that you do, and please... don't feel any particular need to tell me about it (unless it's really lurid). :)

I'm going to be eating junk food and not talking to anybody but Peggy and Eris (sacred avenger of the snubbed) and it's going to be fucking fantastic.

@Leucrotta Big revival on MTV when I was a kid, always had a soft spot for that kind of humor even though the music's not normally quite me...

I know more Monkees lyrics than someone my age should know.

Like, a lot more.

Like, I just recited the entirety of "The Door Into Summer" off the top of my head.

That can't possibly be good.

@001zlnv New one.

@Phorm I think we all dream of a world in which all of our leaders, celebrities, and pundits were frozen in statue form until we went up to talk to them, and refroze immediately after we left. ^______^

We don't really celebrate Trans Day of Remembrance on Mars. About a quarter of our tigresses just run around with our cocks hanging out of our skirts, and most of us are >2.5 m tall, so it's kinda hard to forget (or oppress) us.

We have instead chosen this day to celebrate Terran Day Of Remembrance. We're really, really, really sorry we had to eat you all, but you kinda forced our paws back in 2133. Remember? That thing you did? Anyhow, probably your fault. 🐯​

@Aradia Good lord, why? D:

I had a cheeseburger for breakfast. This is still America, dammit.

Current mood deficiency: precisely one (1) cheeseburger.​

That's not even so much because I'm sad, as much as just really want a freakin' cheeseburger.

I have all I need to make a cheeseburger in the fridge. I could have a cheeseburger. I have done absolutely nothing-- morally, nutritionally, or existentially-- to deserve a cheeseburger.

So you see my dilemma. This question has vexed Martian philosophers since time immemorial. How do I has cheeseburger without eat cheeseburger?

@Momentrabbit If you need some vent space, you know where... *hugs tight* Putting in a word with Pointymom for you.

Fuck it, I'm just gonna let Dawn write the rest of Parallax 'cause if the last three readings are any indication, she has a much better idea what to do with it than I do. :D

This kid Dawn scares me sometimes. Both of them, Dawn Jr. (Lo Scarabeo) and Dawn Sr. (handmade edition). Just like their mother! ❤️​

I've been seeing a fascinating pivot from /r/The_Donald's crowd on Reddit:

Some of them have started acknowledging climate change is real. Their new take is "liberal do-gooders should stay out of things they don't understand, and leave the solutions up to actual engineers." Never mind that that's not what the _actual climatologists_ say to do...

This is an interesting pivot, though. They're getting ready to pull the "oh, we believed all along" trick, mark my words.

a modern day retelling of the diogenes myth except instead of a lantern he carries around a bluetooth speaker thats constantly playing doodlebob from spongebob going "NEEOY YOY MINOY NAYDEE ONMOMOY" just loud enough that nobody's sure if they really hear it