Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

@Phorm I dunno, that meme has considerable revival value. I think it might survive at least 2-3 trips through the Great Bulldada Cycle.

Fifteen minutes later...

*squeakersqueakersqueaker*

She's mashing her li'l pawbs on the front door, her standard way of begging to be let in.

Well, you're asking from THE GROUND, Amelia, so sure. You can come in and hide out from the rain for a bit.

Welp, Artie back outside. We let her hang out for the afternoon as a reward for sticking TO THE GROUND.

I fully expect we're gonna look up and hear SAD MEWING again, but at least we're getting her retrievals down to an exact science. *sigh*

I think next step is flush out neighbor in hopes of getting contact info for landlord. If they blow us off... I start consulting my Mad Engineers friends for advice. I am not above building Artie a ramp and then just busting a b̶i̶g̶ ̶f̶u̶c̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶h̶o̶l̶e̶ catdoor in the side door.

@001zlnv spiced morons

@zx3 (it's fine, I grew up on classic SNL and if we hadn't packed her off to the TNR clinic when she was a baby, she'd probably be an ignorant slut :> )

@Phorm Who in the HELL said that?!?

Yup. Right on back in the attic.

It's a sunny day, we left her a bowl of water, we have no reason to think she's in any danger up there, and we left the ladder in place so rescuing her should be pretty quick and easy.

It's fine. Short-term, I'm dealing, I'm surprised how low-anxiety I am about this. Long-term... I still have absolutely no freakin' clue what we're gonna do with her if she won't learn her lesson from getting stuck.

@xinjinmeng Yeah, nine billion, but these days they do have machines to help automate it so it's really not so bad.

Just... always leave one name hanging, OK? It's just basic safety. Personally, I like to skip "Bea Arthur," although sometimes if I'm in a whimsical mood, I will skip "the Bananas Foster king cake from Brennan's."

Artie's been out all morning and stayed on the ground. We have our first Mardi Gras parades tonight so I brought her back in to hang, to give me one less thing to be distracted by while I try to remember how human gatherings work.

I'm not looking forward to it exactly, it's a lot of noise and social after a really anxious week, but it's SO GOOD for the city that we can do this...

(YES I intend to observe the fuck out of any and all city safety measures, and then some. These are smaller parades and our local COVID numbers are looking quite good. This is a calculated risk and kind of a test run. Although I admit it might be less "do I avoid Mardi Gras this year" and more "do I figure out a way to incorporate an N95 respirator into a zebra mask, pronto." :> )

@xinjinmeng If that doesn't work, modulate your frequencies. It always worked for Geordie and Scottie.

If you're still not getting the results you want, maybe try screaming the name of every entity in the cosmos before your lament, one per scream.

I recommend starting with the most powerful otiote patriarchal gods and working your way down to, like, nature spirits and talk show hosts and whatnot.

So Artie was getting really restless, clingy, and nippy and it was driving me crazy.

I need to get work done. I have no time for Crazy Cat Hour. And I realized that the solution to an insane cat is an insane cat.

I let Peebles in. Now they're chasing each other around the apartment. It's complete and utter chaos but at least it's not chaos centered around ME!

I feel like a feline genius.

@KinkyTurtle this is ME here :)

@anthracite

https://store.playstation.com/en-us/product/UP3362-CUSA06943_00-HORSERACING20161

https://store.playstation.com/en-us/product/UP4489-CUSA03442_00-KICKOFF000000000

https://store.playstation.com/en-us/product/UP2043-CUSA01026_00-FOURKINGS0000000

https://store.playstation.com/en-us/product/UP1663-CUSA04615_00-00000000PMPYSCEA

https://store.playstation.com/en-us/product/UP3643-CUSA01957_00-HATOFULBOYFNDPS4

@001zlnv Yup! Maybe I'll post some photos someday to give everyone a picture of just what a potential engineering and legal clusterfuck this whole situation is. :)

@hystericempress this reminds me that new orleans just got its own beard papa... 🤔​

@001zlnv Nnnnope. If there's one thing I've learned from r/marijuanaenthusiasts*, it's that you do NOT want to fuck with trees on somebody else's legal property.

* r/marijuanaenthusiasts is a Reddit in-joke -- the actual r/trees is the main cannabis subreddit, since that's an old slang term for buds, so a bunch of actual tree-lovers... well, you can figure out the rest yourself. :)

@hystericempress oh ffs, sorry sis, i had a suspicion that might happen-- it was a slot machine bot that pops up three random emoji and a vaguely-related comment every day

today's was a dango emoji and a question like "Are dango inflatable?" So... yeah. You can fill in the rest so to speak. <3

@hystericempress On a related note, did I mention I LOVE your fuckin' marshpoodle? <3

@hystericempress (i guess the really salient question is, is a dango potential inflation tf bait?)

@hystericempress could you answer this one for me?