Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

@Momentrabbit Also, if you very reasonably skip the rant (which isn't so bad but boy is it a lot of words), check Telegram: the really salient thing about today is that I'm basically fine ATM---and the zoo's reopening so I can go visit my buddy Liam. 🐯​🐯​🐯​ Everything else will take care of itself, so looking at the three-page tiger dropping is totally optional. <3

@Momentrabbit And again, that's nothing but a genuine plea. When I say "I really don't know what else to do"... I mean, I'll take advice here. Or donations for a six-week Denver soma holiday as soon as it's safe to travel. It's making me hurt, too. Even Peg is helplessly obsessing over the slights she's taken this week from the Social Justice Slashers, and that's really not like her. I... I'm all out of coping mechanisms here. ;____;

@Momentrabbit
[FRIENDLY ANNOUNCER: The following is not a complaint. It is an attempt at gaining commiseration. Remain Indoors, Keep Calm And Carry On, and above all, Don't Panic!]

For the record, total time between me sending that and running into another incident of Social Justice Abuse: three minutes.

I was really trying to be a nicer calmer person. It was working. Peg was doing me so much good. NOLA was doing me so much good. But I am really at the end of my rope here. I feel trapped from both sides, and it's really hard not to let the despair turn into rage as I watch people fuck each other over again and again.

Yesterday, it was a dragon.style user who canceled Peg because her mild complaint about misusing a hashtag was Clearly An Act Of Virulent Racism And Don't You Know Who I Am. Today's it's leftists cheering for someone (granted, someone genuinely terrible) being doxxed and harassed and a friend getting canceled for "appropriation" in heartfelt personal fiction... by someone they just caught performing a ludicrous act of actual appropriation.

I am SCARED SHITLESS that the exact same thing will inevitably happen to Parallax and kill my baby NO MATTER WHAT WE DO. I ALREADY have one Social Justice Chainsaw Maniac explicitly gunning for me, with the explicit threat of ruining my comic. My crime? Criticizing him after he committed a very likely sexual assault. His tools? Leftist self-righteousness. This causes me existential pain and dread that is far beyond my capacity to deal with, and it comes out as outrage. Is that totally out of line?

It's either give up on social media and endure the harm of even FURTHER isolation, let the pressure build until I go REALLY nuts, or make some attempt tp talk about this with the only emotional tools I have. I... I really don't know what else to do. ;__;

@spacewastrel@yiff.life I hate our allies so fucking much these days. >_______< I just saw a bunch of people dragging someone for saying doxxing someone for daily harassment could have, you know, bad unintended consequences. There is something absolutely rotten on our side of the political spectrum and I wish I had anywhere whatsoever to flee to.

@Momentrabbit Hun, it's not gonna be safe until (a) Trump is out of office (b) I don't see at least one leftist per day on an identity-based bigotry crusade that they're persuaded isn't really bigotry because They're Clearly The Good Guys.

It's gonna be a while. I'll send some snacks.

@hummingrain Hahahaha no. Not without armies of skellingtons and golems to back me up. :)

It's always good to be reminded there are still people cheering for me. Thanks everybody, I'm more or less over the ragedump. <3

Haha, wow. I really needed to spend a few hours as a necromancer. (Kremit's Tale; neat, very difficult and thoughtful puzzle-tile game.)

I feel so much better now. Sometimes ya just need to find refuge in a little harmless villainy, you know?

Now I just need to figure out of I won because I'm awesome or I won because the Necrodude is way overpowered. I'm leaning towards option two...

@matias93 ...

OK, NOW my day is made. <3

Thank you so much. I really needed to hear that from someone I'm not super-close with and can thereby trust that they're not just being nice to me. :)

It'll probably be easier to understand after our first edit pass! We have something like eight pages of clarifications to add. :)

Thank you again for the support!

I'm really trying to be positive in the face of everything and not further indulge the pulsating vein of loathing that's been running through me all day, so... uh...

Stuffed animals? Are good? Also rainbows? And I still like cake. I had some pizza and a salad. It was good. It had fruit in it. Fruit is good.

I'm really doing the best I can here, folks.

No, seriously, a friend said nice things about Parallax today and that actually made my freakin' day. Also, I've been dipping into Istanbul Feral Cat Youtube and it's actually pretty heartwarming.

Oh! And Tuca and Bertie got a second season! That does actually feel like a freakin' miracle. And dragons. Dragons are very good.

And I have a recipe for Singaporean Marmite Chicken. And I can take comfort in the fact that 90% of the people who annoyed me today would be ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED by it. So I can kinda hate them vicariously through crispy pan-fried chicken.

So I got that goin' for me which is nice. And I had a fresh beignet yesterday! And the lumpy thing on my back finally went away.

I can't keep this up. Every time I get my head above the surface I get pulled back down. I kinda hate myself a lot these days. I'm OK. I just don't care much for my own company right now.

@001zlnv le deux

Peggy coined the term "pettin' axe" today while playing Bloodborne up against Vicar Amelia and I... I... now I want a pettin' axe. n.n;;

Shadow is mewing pitifully out on our porch. I checked on her, and apparently she wants to get inside... next door. There is not a thing I can do to help you, darlin'. ;__;

@Balinares *hug* Yeah. Definitely. Two in fact. *hug* This is at LEAST as therapeutic for me as it is for you.

@hystericempress Yeah. *hug* Yeah.

@001zlnv This is the only good political idea I have heard all day. <3

Did I mention the "don't @ me" thing absolutely infuriates me? It's social media. If you're talking in public, people will talk back. There are plenty of ways to make your conversations private. Don't tell me you have to right to make our communications one-way; the best way to not get @'d is to not lecture the world from your pulpit in the first place.

I'll just reply to them with "Ewch yn ôl i'ch fferm gyfrifiadurol, dynol ffug! Yeah. I KNOW you know what I just said!" and refuse to explain further.

Surrealism is my last refuge.

@Balinares But... but... but that would mean carrying a point of queer dogma to a logical, charitable, and inclusive conclusion! YOU SPEAK MADNESS, DRAGON! :O

You know what? I'm done. It's 2020. Reality is optional; delusion is encouraged. I'm just gonna retreat into a conspiracy theory where all the really dumb bigoted queer puritan takes are the work of subversive foreign trollbots. Let's say... oh... Welsh ones. Why the fuck not. 🤷​