Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

i am having the most severe allergic reaction to our culture, "the discourse," and people in general today

i'd need about a four month vacation off-planet among a hedonistic society of aliens who have never even heard of "League of Legends" or "QAnon" or "30-50 feral hogs" just to get back to baseline, defined here as "fantasizing for less than 120 minutes a day about pushing people into traffic"

i feel like the number of animated sitcom episodes i've watched emotionlessly in the last month should qualify me for a death certificate all by itself

is it possible to have just a little touch of cotard's delusion

i feel like i perished somewhere around 2015

granted new orleans is not a half bad afterlife, i did not even expect heaven to have this good of a seafood scene

but i still miss feeling alive and i wish i could at least be one of those ghosts that people actually perceive

instead of just looking right through me and forgetting me altogether when i'm not actively rattling my chains

there's that one weird touched dragon who can still see me but it's all getting to be a bit beetlejuice for my tastes

@arilin I signed up this morning and was pretty happy to see all their security-fix posts. I have a hopeful feeling that they're coming to this from a good practical place, at least.

Is anybody else on Pillowfort? Any opinions? I think I'm gonna wait to share my username over there until I have at least one non-whiny non-depressive post, but I do at least like the site so far.

@Austin_Dern DP7. Yup. I think it was the first comic I ever tried to follow.

One huge argument in favor of non-binary pronouns: they're a HUGE fucking help when you're dealing with a culture where you can't readily tell someone's gender from their name. I have avoided so many embarrassing misgenderings at work by sticking with singular they.

Oh shit. And it just dawned on me that I get my 2nd Moderna shot in 3 1/2 weeks... which means in a month and a half both Peg and I will be largely immune... which means I can take her to Neyow's Creole Cafe for the first time in a fucking year and a half. This is a celebration I've been looking forward to for a REAL long time.

Many a crustacean shall know what it is to be roasted in the belly of a Martian that day, I can tell you.</louis_tully>

Oh, yay. The Indian restaurant I was so excited about mysteriously fell out of my delivery radius a couple weeks ago, and I was crushed. And now it's just as suddenly back in.

I decided to order from this Brigadoon of curries and am very happy. Basically I just had my best Chinese food of the last decade from an Indian restaurant. They have a lot of Indo-Chinese specialties, and Lasuni Gobi is basically General Tso's cauliflower done by people who do not fear spice.

I really have very few things left to bitch about foodwise down here. New Orleans's culinary scene is still kinda stodgy, but the only Necessity For Living I've truly failed to find down here is dim sum.

I guess I'll just have to drown my sorrows in Bloody Marys, cheese grits, and etouffee. I'll get by somehow. *sigh*

@Phorm "Compelling" is an awfully big word for a vixen. Here, suck on this Harmless Alien Device for a second...

@Phorm Turning airheads into space tigers? I mean, you would look good in stripes...

@Phorm "Hey, you turned the tigress into an airhead!"

@JulieSqveakaroo

It's a silent but deadly
Thing that came from my behind
Because I eat lots of beans
And pump them from my jeans
Into spaces that are well-confined

@Phorm Yes, once!</homer_simpson mode:seen_guy_say_goodbye_to_shoe="yes" episode="s08e02">

but then angel was already style goals

(fun fact: my very first female RP character was based on Chrissie Hynde of the Pretenders; not quite Debbie Harry but surely in the same pantheon)

hey, just in case you were wondering, i checked for everybody:

the scene in rock and rule where mok drugs and possibly hypnotizes angel and plays her like an organ in front of thousands of people, glowing control collar and all?

still exceptionally hot.

so fucking grateful every single day that my parents are not fox news casualties and were actually pretty fucking eager to get vaccinated-- they're both well past their two weeks and should be good and immune now

i told my mom i ain't even mad that she refused to support biden, as long as she didn't vote for any trump republicans-- it's not like i like the SOB much myself

@001zlnv @anthracite I wasn't feeling "Plify" despite it having good Pynchonesque vibes. This, on the other hand. I think we've got something here. Oh, hey, were you gonna eat the rest of that? *eats off your diner plate and leaves you with the check*

@anthracite I'm procrastinating on work and stonedly trying to figure out an awful enough first/middle/last name for my new badgersona. A name that says "I will shop right out of your grocery cart." A name that says "Hello, I'd like to discuss my disappointment with my vital organs." A name that says "I am definitely going to get my sleeve in the snack dip."

Among the Martian Tigers, in the court of Empress* Rezeya, courtiers** primly flip through sushi menus and announce meticulously composed hypothetical orders to one another, with all the solemnity and formality of Heian poetry.

Good orders are politely applauded; poor orders are shot down with devastating wit. Truly great orders are met with a sudden mass adjournment to go get dinner.

Most Martian menu ceremonies have at least three orders ranked "truly great" within the course of a single evening.

*disputed
**basically whoever felt like dressing up fancy that day; Mars is an anarchomonarchist society