Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

the best ones are where my latent paranoid streak comes to the surface and you're all witches or space blobs or from the cia or ate a bad computer chip or something and basically my brain casts you in my own personal hitchcock thriller where i have to run away from you

they're especially fun because usually my brain cheats and i have superpowers throughout the whole ordeal and you don't, sorry XD

also as my REM sleep recovers during the tolerance break, the nightmares have been pretty awesome, really

the only bad one involved me having a huge public meltdown and everybody being mad at me, but... you know, that got a huge bolus of mental ick out of my system, 'cause frankly I'd been feeling that way daily since I lost my shit this summer

everything else is just bizarro-seattle where there's a weird catastrophe or invasion every day, but it's not my fault so it's fine XD

fortunately this gives me plenty of time to read news and contemplate sane, humane ideas like "how far could we fight our way into Goldman Sachs corporate hq with 500 queer socialists armed with kitchen knives"

or see if i can get through a 4th playthrough of the complete strong bad emails, which has been pretty rewarding actually

again, don't feel sorry for me, this is basically my week in the regeneration vats -- and i'll be able to appreciate seattle all over again in a week

having a decent but inert day, the jetlag is just kicking my ass. i have every idle pleasure available legally in ohio except for sleep, which effectively means I've done nothing today but watch bad movies with my parents, play armello, and eat cannoli dip and wedding soup.

i feel like that poor fucking ocelot in archer, just running around and around in a nearly empty room. i should really at least try to get some exercise tomorrow.

too much world news and too much glurge today, so i offer this instead:

sit back, relax and ponder

- you too are a constant annoyance to our enemies

- in fact, you are someone else's sign of the apocalypse

- they don't think they could survive in your world

- this is purely something to gloat about

- annoying authoritarian shitheads is the most noble thing you can ever do

- we don't even have to work for it, we just have to keep talking out loud

THE SPORT OF KINGS

https://gfycat.com/EcstaticResponsibleAmericanwirehair

also the sheer amount of expanded universe bullshit in wikipedia's article on fictional revolutionaries makes me want to go far, far back in time and hoof each and every rebel pr flak and historian flat in their rubbery muppet chops

There we go. When the tiger arrives, I'm flipping a coin. If it's heads, "Gavroche." If it's tails, "Jinjur."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jinjur

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gavroche

I want to invite this guy over for beers some night. I'm amazed one of Grant's crowd hasn't tried to rehabilitate him.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag-Smasher

#comix

I should've gotten next-day shipping on that stuffed tiger. I want a ravenous destructive minion NOW!

Or maybe I should just stop looking at the Internet for the rest of the day. -_-

Everyone in the Amazon reviews loves my new tiger friend, but are a little concerned about the fact its head is inexplicably filled with slightly hard styrofoam, not soft polyfil, unlike the rest of it.

I, personally, am delighted. My new friend will have a nice bonky head, the better to ram into bankers at 40 mph. It'll be even better once I install the sound chip that roars, "ECONOMIC VIOLENCE BEGETS PHYSICAL VIOLENCE! EAT BANKERS EVERY DAY OF YOUR FUCKING LIFE!"

OK, after half a dozen attempts and blatantly ignoring the instructions on their website, I finally got my giftcard to work. Apparently Steam and Amazon both have low enough standards to accept a card with no ZIP registered? -_-

I didn't know what else to do with it, so I bought two games and a FUCKING TIGER.

If anyone could recommend a suitably anti-capitalist name for my new FUCKING TIGER friend, I would be delighted. Would it be appropriation to call her Phoolan Devi? Or maybe Dillinger.

#moodsnapshot https://awoo.space/media/V_MESbCEeIXggIeC_GI

KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.
KILL TIMOTHY J. SLOAN.

Fucking sick of getting unusable giftcards with glitchy-ass registry sites from fly-by-night corps making more goddamn money off of deliberate inconvenience and obsolescence, especially while pasty goddamn conservative pundits squawk in my ear about the virtues of hard work and meritocracy getting these motherfuckers where they are

clone me 1000 bluehaired buzzcut transgender robespierres & let me arm them with machetes and a bus painted WELLS FARGO HQ OR BUST

Counterpoint:

"All magic is totally fake, and it works 100% of the time." -- Jeff "Magnus" McBride

"Magic is just completely fake. It's just another word for lying." -- Penn Jillette, on the random Space Ghost episode that popped up on my playlist

Yeah, you slick conceited asshole. But if you're gonna play those games... so is "literature." So is "culture." Fuck, you probably know some biology, Penn: so is "human perception." All "lies"-- useful, vital ones.

This is a classic example of how a rationalist can be totally factual and completely fucking misled at the same time. -_-

I found my holy grail of obscure, ill-conceived tv:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KRW1Z187Ki4

I've been looking for this steamer for 20+ years.