Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space
- location
- all outdoors
- species
- F.O.U.S.
- mood
- bitey
- diet
- you
🔥💫🐯(火星虎)
ɪɴᴄᴇɴᴅɪᴀʀʏ ᴘʟᴀɴᴇᴛ ᴄᴀᴛʙᴇᴀsᴛ ʀᴇᴢᴇʏᴀ
read this, pitiful humans:
http://egypt.urnash.com/parallax/
Joined Jun 2017
post-rant color commentary
Just... please take me seriously, okay? The sense of dismissiveness and "oh, we know what you are, Kin" that I've gotten when I've tried to talk about this stuff in the past is part of the cycle. It hurts. A lot.
Confession: the trigger event was silly. It was an RT about Fight Club and how men who like it "too much" are untrustworthy. But it triggered some real feelings about my identity... and what sort of snap-judgements I'd be subjected to if I ever abandoned it.
post-rant color commentary
Apologies to anyone who saw my rant earlier.
I stand by what I said in it. There have been some tectonic changes in my self-identification over the last year, and the main thing keeping me from talking about them is social fear. And I am intensely frustrated at certain common behaviors in trans activist circles right now.
But you're right, there's no reason to make waves over it, and I'm too freshly agitated over Birdsite Issues for my tone to be trustworthy here.
Today's tiger mood...
The tiger has an idea for a better mood: "asleep." The tiger is sick anyhow and will put as much effort into establishing this mood as possible.
There is no need to fear the tiger. The tiger will not eat you under any circumstances. The tiger is well-fed and regularly petted. But it has come to the tiger's attention that its roaring is distressing to some people, especially when this roaring is performed within <6" of their stupid face.
There is a chance of some roaring.
Today's tiger mood...
is "DON'T."
The tiger has no mood. The tiger has chosen to have no mood, in the interest of peace and quiet for everybody. The tiger is really working hard, with good will towards all who will return it, on not having a mood.
Perhaps you will join us in ensuring the tiger need not develop a mood. It would be a terrible, loud thing if the tiger were to have a mood today. The best way you can ensure the tiger succeeds is by not making it make any choices about people today.
@norighttobenotoffended@mastodon.host The power of your whining could power a small city.
@LeDiva About fucking time, small cat. <3 <3 <3
Sorry, we're going to have to reboot the Internet and start all over again. This one's been maxxed out.
uspol; misanthropy
Fuck it. I'm becoming a Premature Benderite by about 1,000 years. Wanna get together and kill all humans?
uspol; misanthropy
I'm coming to the increasing conclusion that the only thing keeping us from being them is the current lack of a cunning enough Lenin-grade bastard. I've gone through life hoping that there was something "better" about us, some superior reason or character or compassion that made us less prone to folly.
But this year has left me without any faith. I totally support leftist ideals, but it's increasingly despite my fellow travelers, not because of them.
Goddamn it.
uspol; misanthropy
That awful moment when you're reading the leftist reaction to the Hannity/Cohen story on Twitter, and you realize that... side of the angels or not... most of these are not bright or thoughtful people either. They are just as capable as their opposition of taking what they hope to be true and working backwards from there. Running on pure cognitive bias, and thank god they at least picked the side I agree with to be fanatical about.
moods (~ and lower); icelandic pixie queens; a soupcon of self-pity
This Bjork quote is weighing pretty heavily on me this morning. I tried, I really tried, with the Jackalope Mother as my witness I tried, but I wasn't equal to the task and my goddamned cantankerousness ruined it like it ruins everything. I'm sorry. I'll probably be sorry for the rest of my life. ;____;
me (~)
Been hit by oddly apathetic and/or cunning flu. It raged a bit overnight and ~1 hour after waking up; now it's just feebly scratching at my throat. Either way, gives me an excuse to put off a dental cleaning, so I'll take it.
Everything else is meh. Deliberately keeping the fuck away from several disputes, including my own. Progress on Parallax-Red is slow & steady. Peggy remains my emotional MVP, somehow. :) Watching lots of sitcoms. Feeling detached & draconic. Want mac & cheese, cake.
stoned shitpost
The Varallax Pubes (1974)
Well, it's better than store-brand Weltschmerz. #moodsnapshot
@emanate That was totally worth it, thank you. :)
(They sold me Vol. 3 of Gail Simone's Clean Room. Hoooly fuck.)
medical stuff
Yay, is there anything more fun than an appointment where the doctor says "We found a little lump and we'd like you to come back in a week and get it looked at?"
I'm probably just fine. It was just a dental appointment and when I asked the hygienist she assured me it was one of those "just keep an eye on it, you're probably fine" things.
But still. I can't even find the damn lump he's talking about, and I'm getting that hypochondriac TWITCH that I sincerely thought I'd outgrown...
Empress of Mars: Undisputed
boosted
On being a gamer (long ramble)
By all intents and purposes, I am a gamer, but I hate what that label means and infers, nowadays. Allow me to explain.
I was born in the 70s into a family family that was being guided (and willingly following) into a culty version of Evangelical Fundamentalism.
I was hyper-sensitive and had difficulty parsing social cues, which made public school difficult, and I was placed into a culty farmhouse school for the majority of my growing up. For years, I was the only child in my grade, my homework was copying and reciting biblical verses, and my textbooks were from those weird Jesuscamp kinds of suppliers. My outside media exposure was highly censored and monitored, and almost everything I found an interest in had to be verified, analyzed, and monitored in how much content I was allowed to ingest.
I went through the 80s with mostly a peripheral knowledge of the cultural impact... likely why I don't have the Baby-Boomer mindset, despite being very much in that age bracket.
Being in that school, and living in that church (not literally, but I was there a LOT), and having the majority of my childhood under padlock was not at all good for my ability to handle reality once I grew up enough to make my own decisions (which was far later than it ought to have been) and severely hobbled my ability to ever be normal when it comes to being social.
The happiest memories I have, though, were at the arcade. Every week on Saturday, Dad would take me to the arcade, and for one hour a week, I'd be a perfectly normal kid dropping a coin into the slot and fully embracing the fantasy of getting as many points as possible in the given three lives. These electronic worlds were my fantasies and escapes. I wouldn't call them my safespaces because the RL bullies were in the arcades back then, as well... but the home versions that I was allowed to have definitely did become my safe space, as did the mental real estate that those game worlds held in my head and dreams.
My folks did have issues with the degree of time I'd put into those games and not into the bible, of course... I remember a lot of terribly brainwashing self-help books of why videogames can be evil and why D&D was devil worship and junk like that... but my love for all things game-related had already become a deep part of my self-identity.
All my life, games have been a fixations, my vices of choice, my comfort zones, my addictions, my obsessions, and more than occasionally my perversions. They still are. That's not likely ever going to change.
The difference, though, is that it angers and destroys me a little inside every single time I read about, converse with, or encounter someone that takes the moniker of "gamer" and uses it to try and deny or gate the notion that other folks are not allowed to enter that area that was once my oasis.
Anyone should be able to grab a controller, roll some dice, draw a card, look at their INV, or press a start button if they want to try it out, and there shouldn't be any reqvired meta-knowledge or pedigree involved in picking a game up. There shouldn't be any racial, gender, lingual, or classist qvalifiers. Skill in any game is not TheWizard-level inate for anyone, nor will some folks ever achieve it, nor should anyone ever need to if it isn't what they want to pursue. There is nothing wrong with a casual game of solitare on your phone. There is nothing wrong with min-maxing your Warcraft character's damage per second if that's your happy.
There is everything wrong with bashing someone because they do not game at your level. There is everything wrong with griefing, doxxing, swatting and spiritually destroying someone else because they are a random name that got in your way.
This was my safe space, and it was where I kept my sanity in the daily brainwashing that still affects my everyday.
It infuriates me when access to that space is denied, gated, or too harrasment-filled.
I am a gamer. I am a gamer that will happily suggest a couple of games to a soccer mom trying to pick out something for their 8yr old that they want them to enjoy, but not have sexualized or violent content. I am a gamer that will donate parts of their collection to their friend's, their friend's kids, or as gifts. I am a gamer that will ramble on for an hour or two about game mechanics, game series, jump scares, or pixelated graphics.
Gaming is still a huge passion of mine; always will be.
I just try to be a very inclusive one.
speaking of cultural sensitivity
honest to god sometimes it's like watching a couple of toddlers get into a stash of novelty finger handcuffs -_-
speaking of cultural sensitivity
I just don't think there is anything to be lost by representing our opponents in all their nuance... their often horrible, often ignorant, often violent nuance, and that requires being honest on those occasions they're NOT acting like our stereotypes.
I'm still on your side. But I'm officially very nervous about how disinterested some leftists are in hearing things that contradict their view of the world. That's just fucking dangerous, and I won't support it.
- location
- all outdoors
- species
- F.O.U.S.
- mood
- bitey
- diet
- you
🔥💫🐯(火星虎)
ɪɴᴄᴇɴᴅɪᴀʀʏ ᴘʟᴀɴᴇᴛ ᴄᴀᴛʙᴇᴀsᴛ ʀᴇᴢᴇʏᴀ
read this, pitiful humans:
http://egypt.urnash.com/parallax/
Joined Jun 2017
