Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

Doing a lot better this morning. Yeah, it was definitely bad brain chemistry.

Dragon helped a lot.

You helped a lot.

This crimebear helped a little so I'm sharing it. <3

It dawned on me that a good cry might help. I've read that it can help flush out bad brain chemistry and it may have worked in the past. So I pushed myself into crying on Peg's shoulder and you know, I do feel better.

Still scared shitless for the cats. Did a little research and at least reassured myself that evacuations don't happen *that* often in NOLA. But they still happen often enough that we'll probably have to go through this at least once during their lifetimes.

I am gonna write some more local cat charities in the morning and hope one of them eventually actually gets back to me with either some practical advice or a "nah, they're usually fine." Or even a "yeah, it's part of living down here, you get used to it."

'Cause the guilt of not doing enough for them would wreck me, possibly lethally.

and i'm also suffering some emotional fallout from realizing that in the event of a severe hurricane that requires an evacuation... there's no fucking way we can evacuate six cats that all HATE being in carriers even for a 10 minute car trip, and the best we can do for them is give them big hugs before leave and pray real hard to Bast. I think that's fucking broken me too.

also it's really really really scary not being able to think straight again after years of whatever-the-fuck caused my chronic fatigue being in remission

if this is permanent it's probably goodbye, sorry -- though i'm at least somewhat reassured it's probably not. this ain't my first relapse scare by a long shot.

sorry about that folks, i was feeling a little broken all day and then for some reason _that's_ what crashed me

it's a known issue. i've had a bad case of Martian Brain Flu all day. some part of me that knows better is terrified it's a permanent new effect of the covid vaccine on my mutant physiology. -__-

either way, there is definitely a brain chemistry issue going on and if i don't feel better in the morning i'll start the self-care checklist <3

and if i still don't feel better in a month i'll contact a doc or two, promise -- i don't really have the OPTION of going anywhere. cats/dragon/parents need me.

there was a day when i would have been so excited by the prospect of dressing up in one of these crazy garish shiny things

the fault is not with the design or designers, not a criticism; it's purely with me

it's all gone and i barely even feel it. i've lost so much of who i am.

i am here for peg and my mom and the cats and not a hell of a lot else. i wonder what it felt like to experience physical pleasure? i literally can not remember. that part of my brain has basically rotted out completely.

i wish sometimes there were a graceful way i could just leave quietly without hurting anyone i care about

https://twitter.com/karinKariwanz/status/1397729353861976067

i will never cease to marvel at the capacity of my fellow leftists to sneer at even the possibility of victory

I will never get tired of replying to threads where people try to compare black people to monkeys... by showing them pictures of _actual_ shaved chimps.

Yeah, just guess what color their skin is. White, white, white.

The best part? Pointing out, "You know, if you just gave this little guy a MAGA hat, a Bud, and a Marlboro, you'd have a dead ringer for your Uncle Dad."

Never fails to get an entertaining reaction.

what can i say

i just couldn't handle life on the outside

i need the peace and focus that twitter jail gives me, specifically the peace and focus of not having to read twitter for a while

Today's mood: fighting the urge to argue with sweeties because their pessimism ain't helping anybody and it comes dangerously close to retriggering my own case of despair in remission.

C'est l'amour. It ain't you unless it is, and if it is, I still love you and am mostly mad at the forces that are doing this to us. Shrug.

The ultra-seedy bodega down the street turns out to be running ELEVEN ghost kitchens on DoorDash, none of which have over a 3 star rating. FOUR of them are wing places with virtually identical menus.

I ain't even mad. I am impressed by their audacity.

my vaxx side effects totally disappeared while i was giving artie Epic Pets

and now they're coming back

truly cats are magical

(or maybe i was just distracted by warm nuzzly beige fluff, sweet bast, artie's the nicest supervillain 've ever met <3 )

actually i've been pretty happy with how not horrible this has been, it's just been some body aches and general yuck feeling and it might already be fading

➡️​🐯​⬅️​

Oh, be warned that the base material I'm dealing with would definitely be in the horror genre. How intense it is can be geared to the players, but at the *very* least you've going to be captive lab specimens for a corporate cult.

This could get pretty dark but I can easily keep it to, say, DC Animated Universe levels of "dark" with most of the nasty stuff off-screen and an emphasis on cartoon TF "peril" instead of actual gritty danger.

But I'll be honest, I could use some catharsis and would be delighted if I got 4-8 volunteers whose hearts were all as vile and depraved as mine so we could go Full Cronenberg on this. XD

OK, I'm bored as hell and need a creative project that isn't Parallax. And I get the vibe that people could kind of use a distraction and an excuse for some social contact right now.

I have a campaign concept I've been rolling around for years. I've mentioned it here a couple of times: it's a "hauntological" furry psi-horror lab escape scenario inspired by the Prisoner, Scanners, Videodrome, and high-concept techno-horror movies.

I would be willing to do a really lazy attempt at running this, for anyone who's desperate enough to put up with the world's flakiest GM. :)

I generally trust anyone here to know how to RP, so this would all be storygame-style, with a lot of narrative flexibility. I have a half-assed idea for a quick and dirty system, or I could just break down and learn the FATE system. We'll talk out the details if it gets to that point.

Zero guarantees, but I wanted to at least start gauging interest. This is kind of a Hail Mary play, but it sounds like we might need one after the last couple years. <3

warning: the camera ends when coming out of the hairy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FpLdPY4ZtTI (cw: ending camera; hairy coming out)

(non-joke cw: surgical tools and a faint air of menace)

cw: testicular injury

submitted without further comment

https://kentuckysportsradio.com/pop-culture/getting-to-the-bottom-of-the-funniest-snl-related-story-ever-told/

TIRED: engagement rings
WIRED: engagement plushies

You know what?

I'm not staying silent on this for a moment longer.

I say if Crow thinks they're a Bellerian, they're a fuckin' Bellerian.

She looked good, dammit.

go straight up to a rich artist and tell them that the armed robbery you're committing is a unique NFT opportunity

give them a little QR code cerification sticker, shake their hand, and stride right home

After posting that, I wound up looking up "lime twist" on Wikipedia for a laugh, and briefly misread a sentence there as "Twists are typically cut from a whole fresh fruit with a small kitchen kitten."

And now I have the greatest idea for a theme bar. Does anyone know where I can get bulk restaurant-grade Kitten Sanitizer?

(Don't worry, the cocktails contain no actual kitten! Just trace kitten by-products. Like love and warmth. And a little hair. ^__^ )