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Gaze through the Eye of the Cake Pops to behold an entire new world OF SUGAR!

So I answered my own questions;

1) my boss at this last place mistreated me, though not necessarily deliberately.

2) drawing satisfies 3 of 4things really important to me and gives a temporary sense of the fourth, so of course I'm motivated to do it! I've been justifying the outlay of time and effort to myself as "at some point I'll go f/t professional," but maybe I don't NEED to go pro nor justify it.

This brings me to the question of "do I actually want to go f/t pro?" which is complex.

I'm driven to improve my drawing and painting, but it's hard to reconcile my belief that I'm building skills to do this for a living, with my incredible lack of hope about ever successfully escaping this mess.

If I really feel that hopeless, why am I that motivated? If I really feel that motivated, why don't I have optimism to match?

Wow, it was a mistake to get stuck on "Pynk" (I mean, the video has a ROADTRIP! with a DINER! how am I gonna not obsess about that?) and not listen to any of Janelle Monae's other songs, does she write anything that isn't ridiculously catchy?

If I ever did a story or movie about the ACW, I think I'd want this as part of the soundtrack. youtu.be/OKOifoyMbRs

... it says something about where I grew up that how I imagine the ACW is a lot of trudging up and down steep slopes in pine forest.

Copying comics pages by Carlos Meglia and Joe Madureira, Wednesday and today. Meglia is really good at planning around word balloons, but I got stuff from Mad! too.

Be careful! Most of the iceberg lettuce lies beneath the surface of the salad!

Cw for food; they had a “prime rib omelette” special cheaper than huge pancakes, so I did that instead. Not pictured; promptly ruining this with salt and chipotle sauce.

Permission to leave temp job on last day, early. Seriously pondering going to Black Bear Diner for giant pancakes as breakfast when I get out.

@Daylight probably too late to catch aardwolf themed podcast

Special aardwolf later today 7pm GMT. The invasion of the insect-eating hyena floofs. They are sure to brighten your day and protect important crops from pests.

(📷 SerenityPhotography/Shutterstock.com) twitter.com/WindleBeth/status/

It is taking like nothing to make me growl and fold ears over on Twitter. Obvious solution is that I'll be *here* instead, so I apologize for the incoming flood of shitposts.

I'm just a terrible person and I have nothing to keep going for. I'm gonna try sleeping a little.

just feeling terrible and weepy and of course the last place I want to go with it is Slack.

uspol 

bloodthirsty assholes. How many of us have to be dead for it to be enough for them?

Gyatei gyatei haragyatei harasogyatei boji sowaka.

mh cont 

The feelings of being innately deficient and therefore innately damned to poverty, rejection and isolation, are really screaming at me right now. I want to go home so I can work on this.

mh - 

She managed to upset me enough to skip lunch. Which means even though I’m not feeling as miserable as earlier, I still feel like it’s been decided I’m an inept moron, and I’m now low on blood sugar. At worst I’m still stuck here 80 more minutes. Trying to remember I have only one more day trapped here.

song lyrics 

there must be something else
there must be something good
far away, far away from here
far away, far away from here
far away, far away from here
far away, far away from here
and I’ll be here for good.

song lyrics 

Can’t wait for tomorrow
I might not have that long
I’ll tear my heart out
Before I get out

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