Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

I keep a close watch on this heart of mine.
I walk the line.
I walk the line.
I’m already dead!
I’m already dead!
I’m already dead!
I’m already dead!

Who is this mysterious creature who has an INSATIABLE LOVE for the DEAD?

… okay so “a historian” is probably not the right answer here.

First Attack https://youtu.be/WnigFGD2MPE via @YouTube

oh no our secret weapon has been completely neutralized and those are clearly not Harkonen regulars, we're facing Elite Space Badasses. Perhaps it might help to run at top speeds discharging weapons in no particular direction like the cover of a mid-90s "Warhammer" codex.

oh YEAH they gave me the day off

so NOW I know my plans in case the crepe shop is closed, here's a hint;

oh yes I forgot to tell you, the Spice exists on only one planet in the known universe, a desolate dry planet of vast deserts. Hidden away in the rocks of this desert are a people known as the Fremen who have long held a prophecy that a man would come, a messiah, who would lead to true freedom. The planet is Arrakis, also known as Dune.

Dude. The Force Awakens came out in 2015. Between *waves at all this* and the glut of Star Wars content between Ep IX and now, it manages to feel *much* further back.

Popurri Star Wars (Mariachi Cover) https://youtu.be/zB6i5X--ozQ via @YouTube

"deeply Catholic boy from desert nowhere falls in love with girl with big brown eyes, and that's how he gets involved with communist revolutionaries" seems pretty Mexican

Galactic Empire - The Battle of Yavin Launch from the Fourth Moon https://youtu.be/Eu0P7GydVRw via @YouTube

red leader we count 30 new signals - enemy fighters coming your way.

hmm

Toto's theme to Dune is making me wonder whether having a half-edible is in order tonight

blessed be the Maker and his water.

Today’s #drawing, a ghoul king feasting on his throne, flanked by a jester and an armored guard.

oh yeah Zulu! The movie which taught me how to properly use both an ilkwa/isiHlangu *and* a bayoneted rifle! I'm sure these are *vital* skills for enthusiastic preteens to know.

Okay so a comparison;

A Ford F150 is about 17.4-20.8’ long, 6.7-7.3’ wide, 6.3-6.7’ height.

A WWII era M6 artillery tractor (after the war some got repurposed as industrial vehicles) is 21.5’ long, 10’ wide, 8.8’ height.

A WWII era M35 cargo truck (the stuff you usually see converted to “gun trucks” to protect convoys in Vietnam) is 22.9’ long, 7.8’ wide, 9.3’ height.

I’m gonna suggest that the events of all the sequels (but especially Ep IX) didn’t work great as movies but would have been a profoundly enjoyable TTRPG campaign, something the players would tell stories about for years.

WHY does the First Order use not just speeders but also rocket pack dudes who launch off them other than it looks badass? Lando’s at Burning Man and saves the day with people who didn’t show up last movie? AWESOME. How about dodging stormtrooper occupation forces on a dangerous mission to access Threepio’s memory? Let’s do it.

Again reminded that Rise of Skywalker was not so much a BAD film as a completely baffling one. They got everything superficial 100% right about Star Wars and nothing more substantive. It’s (almost) like a SW movie made for or possibly by 10 year old me. How do you even have ANY Death Star ruins intact to climb around? Who cares, dungeon crawl! Does it make sense that old Sheve P’s back? No but extensible robot arm in a Sith temple looks awesome!

Weirdly a silver lining to such a shitty childhood is I can’t look back from the dark of another Covid winter with looming fascism, more Disney content, and unaddressed climate change, and wish I were 10 or 16 or 25 again when life was great, BECAUSE IT WASN’T. I was lucky enough to get free and start hacking (so the hardest part of the process) on my personal bullshit in the 90s when everything wasn’t falling apart the same way.

Attack of the perennially surprised looking elves.

It’s being A Morning with customer calls and, unfortunately, pipes are frozen so the john won’t flush. Only a little bit til lunch and a nice luxurious whizz.

Also, unrelated, if I never hear someone talk about how nobody wants to work anymore? I’d be fine with that.

Saug meine Eier, Arschloch!

Imagine if you had two countries filled with people about as even tempered as I am, who wanted to be dragged into someone else’s vital bullshit about as much as I do, and then one of them invaded the other. That would be a completely murderous shitshow, wouldn’t it?

This courtesy of the customer who went off on me, this morning. I’m very glad not to be around her when she’s actually angry.