Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

Guess who had an anxiety attack, slept *maybe* 4.5 hours last night, is now in their 10th hour of work, caught a 25 minute nap as lunch break and is scientifically redefining “foul mood” right now?

a straight up panic attack, far too early in the morning for me to have an edible to get past it, was not what I really wanted.

ah yes the Meat Puppet's "How Stoned Were We When We Wrote this Album"

listening to the MAX song.

and we say we're in love with all of it,
and we say we're in love with everything,
and we lie. Love to lie.

Here's sort of the stuff I was thinking about with #drawings of Edo period types - six people in civilian outfits without real armor. "Fires and fights are the flowers of Tokyo."

trying to dig up Crane Wives albums without remembering the group's name led me to discover Monster Coyote's album "Stoner to the Boner," which I feel is appropriately latrans.

But a challenge to worldview is always going to be a hard sell, incredibly difficult when that worldview is the conservative belief that they’re constantly under attack, and basically impossible when facing that worldview, legit bigotry, *and* intentional manipulation. The same right wing politicians and media puppets sold upper middle class people that any tax increase will hit *them*, and next to that “you’ll be blamed for shit which is not your fault” is easy.

It’s profoundly upsetting that critical race theory, which has valid things to say, was always doomed to become a conservative bogeyman. I honestly feel that it lets individuals off the hook; how can anyone who’s trying to be at least a semi decent person be blamed for stuff way bigger and older than they are being fucked up? And I feel like greater equality seriously pays off for *white* people, just not our ruling classes.

*country music *
*shiny factory new F150 skids to halt*
*candidate steps out*
“Mah truck mah TRUCK mah truck. GUNS.”
*candidate empties an entire clip*
“BANG vaccine mandates BANG CRT bang bangity bang bang bang.”
*candidate looking up to the left, in front of a crying eagle head superimposed over a waving blue line flag*
“Truuuuuuuck.”

Glenn Miller - When That Man Is Dead and Gone https://youtu.be/VCyBllLmCwk via @YouTube

and the train conductor says
take a break, driver 8
driver 8, take a break,
we've been on this shift too long.
and the train conductor says
take a break, driver 8
driver 8, take a break,
we can reach our destination,
but we're still a ways away,
but it's still a ways away.

only one #drawing today, I wound up really revamping my illithid "augmented" dragon and didn't tighten that up. So you get a fire elemental warrior mounted on a hellhound, and a fire elemental noble.

Well he slept with the goblins!
He buggered a troll!
He tongued Gollum's precious
A magic ring he stole!
He was knotted by wolves!
Rimmed in the forest!
Frotted with the cutest of the elf-king's twinks!

now hobbits are cautious folks y'know
they always carry condoms and they take things slow
they always set safewords and plan out their scenes
and they always take care to have their partners screened
BUT ONE DAY Bilbo was asked to go
on a great adventure to the caves below
to help some dwarves relieve their lusts
and to get it on with dragons with gigantic busts

My grandfather used to tell me stories about his time in the NYPD. He was one of those guys whose military or emergency services time was really central to them, but his stories tended to be self effacing, like about getting his uniform torn to shreds running after a purse snatcher - through a construction site.

There was exactly one story where he sounded actively *proud* to have done something violent in uniform - he literally tossed a German American Bund member back onto the subway platform for mouthing off about Hitler (this was sometime before the US entered the war, which wasn't a sure thing at the time).

I'm thinking about this as contrast to the story about *two* NYPD officers teaming up to toss someone beyond the gate for confronting them about not being masked during the pandemic.

Thinking about this, it maps to the conditionally white/invisible/villainous place Jews occupy in the USA (and probably beyond); villains, but never straightforward ones, discardably convenient (shut up, sit down, don’t do anything weird and Heeby, please serve our business and political ends), or nonexistent. All the athletes, scientists, musicians and artists couldn’t change that bias.

When I get off shift should I draw
1) fire elementals
2) illithid experimentally augmented dragon
3) Edo period street fighters
4) gunfighter vs ghouls

I can see the stereotypes of Asians flip this but not exactly; some physicality is acknowledged as basically exoticism, and I guess part of the intellectual only bias is helped along by how large academics loom in East Asian cultures. The closest Jews come are stereotypes of doctors, lawyers, accountants but other than we’re supposedly ugly there’s no physical aspect to the bias… which sure feels like a similar “where is this minority valued by capitalism?”

So a while back @chimerror brought up TERFy bio essentialism compared to racism. I hadn’t previously thought about how much Black people are stereotyped as physical as a holdover of slavery. A bias towards mentioning Black athletes, musicians (especially if they double as a dancer or pretty face as in pop music), comedians (it’s very physical), despite that if something’s out there, someone Black is doing it, from classical music to white collar crime. Okay, that’s vile, AND…

Three photos of fall colors at the beach yesterday, late afternoon.