Rain Dog @Leucrotta@awoo.space

#drawing last night

Here’s some inks I worked on yesterday. #drawings

gettin' into "The Battle of Yavin" by nervously checking my high 6

I am going to die thanks to Republicans and probably soon. If I don't die in a hate crime, at a protest, or thanks to some variety of preventable disease, I can still die in a shooting, driven to homelessness, as fallout from climate change, or at the very least because healthcare is unaffordable.

My family history of heart disease is a similar long term risk compared to how THEY are going to do me in, one way or another. It's the unimportant little person version of how King and X knew damn well they were going to die.

I'm triggered and I KNOW it, which is not unreasonable for having Reagan's America back but now infinitely more offensive and as a speedrun.

Not only when I tally up the recent past (eg, today's the first day I've colored art in a month), but also I think things like "they are bullies, so I know EXACTLY what they are doing; they are pushing until someone reacts violently so that they can beat heads AND be self righteous about how they're the reasonable good people."

There is no social contract anymore, you're still supposed to be a good little kike/good little faggot/whatever and comply with rules and regulations which apply to YOU but not, never, the GOOD VALUED PEOPLE.

The cream always rises to the top. We know because the people who claim to be the cream tell us so while they're abusing us.

Been a while since I #colored a #drawing, let's fix that as a way to try coping with The Horrors and The Sunday Feelings.

"Ben's Death and TIE Fighter Attack," John Williams => "Takin' a Ride," Don Felder => "Goodbye Blue Sky," Pink Floyd => "Me 262," Blue Oyster Cult => "Aces High," Iron Maiden => "Supermarine," Hans Zimmer

oh yeah he bites a scorpion in half BIG DEAL FENNEC FOXES DO THAT ALL THE TIME and they're cuter than The Rock oiled up c. 2001 although to be fair The Rock doesn't make noises which are as obnoxious #iiiiiiii #EEEEEEEEE

* listens to soundtrack while SOBER believe it or not *

do you think the Anubis Warriors in The Mummy Returns make that OOOOOORRRRH noise because it's actually a jackal bark/howl pitch shifted to a 9' tall crinos

So Primarchs are larger even than Space Marines and Vulkan, founder of the Salamanders, was large even by those standards. But he’s also documented as having a sense of humor so that’d make him the JOLLY GREEN GIANT.

Clearly this is why GW isn’t going to sell (presumably mushy) peas

Alpha Flight should have someone like Gambit only he throws energized Timbits and also if you get too close he dumps his cup of coffee on you

✨special Valentines coyote sing along✨

Love is the answer
Love is the answer
I’m not thinkin’ about LIU KANG
JOHNNY CAGE
SONYA
RAIDEN
JAX
KITARO
I’m thinkin’ about good sex
Pure sex
Deep sex
Rrrrrrough sex!

Happy 40K-looking enshrined saint's skull day!

corollary; we're surrounded by and live in a place run by people who are not in fact all that and a bag of chips, but who have been told that or treated that way so frequently they sincerely believe they're fantastic omnicompetent people who deserve better than what's already pretty good.

logically, the opposite is true, where a not especially terrible person can be completely wrecked through indoctrination.

now starting to see it better;

trying to grow up with undiagnosed ADHD and trauma means feeling terrible when I don't understand, get bored with dumb shit important to the rest of the world, or am irritable. This opens me up to

being scolded or emotionally abused, especially if there's just seemingly no break, especially because that's a lot more constant if I don't really have any sense of a long term, which becomes

sincerely believing at some big underlying level that I'm bad or flawed. And if I'm constantly braced for *some* sort of emotional attack, such that I don't have resources to step back or challenge my idea, if I'm triggered fairly often (still no good sense of a long term), and have that as an underlying assumption

of course I'm going to go through life thinking I'm flawed, a fuck up, and that I'm waiting for the next something terrible to happen.

also, a short video about tank treads mentioned the FLANGE on "Little Willie." somehow that reminded me this exists

https://youtu.be/mUn12KvkgdI

nsfw use of language

#drawing of a batch of African antelope/bovid/caprid heads after Kingdon.

I mean... I can see why rebels didn't pilot stolen TIEs without going into doctrinal differences. Standard TIEs have no hyperdrive; you follow a TIE, you find a carrier or a base. You can't follow an X-wing that jumps to hyperspace and the Alliance can't risk their bases being flushed out easily.

#drawings Saturday, trying to figure out some figural/portrait stuff riffing off 40k.