ramona✅ @Ramona@awoo.space

hrt is biohacking, discuss

also i wish i could come out at work because it's SO OBVIOUS that I'm not a guy (to the point where people get kinda confused on my pronouns until I speak) but I'm just too afraid to tell my bosses that I'm a girl who goes by Ramona!!!

i wish i had a sultry femme voice but i sound like a 14 year old boy and i don't really have time to voice train

@ThatDamnCat yeah! my doc said that my testosterone was still kinda far from cis girl levels so he decided to bump me up. honestly i might just start taking 200 instead because the side effects of 300 aren't worth it (and i'm also looking into an orchi if that doesn't work out)

thank you for all of your advice aaaaa you're wonderful <3

@ThatDamnCat but yeah!!! even a year on HRT, orgasms are a LOT better (they're very full-body instead of just sort of centralised which is still wild to me but i love it) but it also takes me a bit to reach orgasm

@ThatDamnCat oh! damn, that's a long time, i've only been on it for juuuust over a year, i think? it's been A Time

god i'm worried about fully losing my erections since like, i'm dysphoric about everything EXCEPT my genitals (which is weird but yeah) and penetration can be fun sometimes!

i mean worst comes to worse i could just ask my doc for a viagra script or something (or maybe change from spiro to something else like bicalutamide if i ever have the $$$)

@ThatDamnCat also by the end part, did you mean that like, your erections are gone but you're having rly good orgasms? or did i read that wrong

@ThatDamnCat YEAH like...for me personally, i need like...a LOT of oral stimulation to get to a point where i can be like "cool, i'm ready now!" and if i don't have enough stimulation in between oral and penetration it just sort of goes away :(

which is why nowadays i usually just go down on whoever i'm with and tell them that they don't have to rly do anything to me because i don't want them thinking they're doing a bad job when it's just my libido being fucked

also like...taking off my shirt is Embarrassing because of how hairy i am (i'm nowhere near as hairy as i used to be but like...i just wanna be cute)

i'm really sad that my hrt dosage has fucked up my sex drive rly bad

i just had a cute girl over and we did everything but penetrative sex because i couldn't stay hard enough to get started and like

this was never the case pre-hrt or even before my dosage was bumped up to what it is now (300mg spiro, 4mg estradiol, used to be 100mg spiro and 3mg estradiol) and it Sucks

i just have a lot of love to give, i guess.

also speaking of like...partners and stuff, it's so weird that lately i've been having a really hard time thinking about my sexuality??? like...

i usually ID as a lesbian, but the thing is, i just generally dig people who aren't cis men??? like i very much dig anyone who id's as femme/nb so i feel like i can't call myself a lesbian

also one of my wonderful partners drew this picture of me and i'm so happy because it's literally me
https://awoo.space/media/BBSvTXbW4AQG16Z-4ZQ

i'm so glad that this sort of infrastructure exists because like, i feel like i can post shit here without fascist bastards trying to make me feel bad lmao

https://awoo.space/media/FpNPoHUQjc-yrTpIcDc

i don't look too bad here i guess!!!

@ThatDamnCat OH! that would make sense. thanks!

oh, so pictures won't go under content warnings. huh.

jesus fuck i'm a trans girl stereotype honestly. i'm primarily a linux user (except i play too many Windows-exclusive games to switch over permanently), i smoke an unnecessary amount of weed and fuck w/ other drugs sometimes, i dress like a total dyke and i never shut the fuck up about how gay i am at any given moment

also i love moc so much as a media player. i wish i could get more into midnight commander and other similar terminal apps but not being able to drag things w/ my mouse is kind of a drag.