Another day, another demand to prove that racial injustice is actually a factor in a specific circumstance. I get that folks find it hard to believe that black folks have to deal with race in pretty much everything we do, especially in the US, but it would be nice to just, I don't know, have someone go "I don't understand this, but it's clear that this is a big deal for you. I'll keep trying to understand and come back to you with questions."
This "explain to me" business is so tiring.
Daily Dreamwidth:
https://jakebe.dreamwidth.org/490915.html
Blowing the dust off my Dreamwidth journal because I think I just need a place to put down my thoughts on a daily basis: https://jakebe.dreamwidth.org/490697.html
Good morning Mastonauts!
I feel like I'm settling back into myself with a morning self-care routine:
Meditation, Bullet Journal, my Spotify Swagger & Strut playlist. Right now, this song is absolutely my jam:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQbjS0_ZfJ0
A year ago today I received a call from a social worker in Baltimore telling me that my sister's two youngest children were in foster care. Two months later, my sister would be dead of a drug overdose.
The last year has been extraordinarily difficult, but I've also found a strength I didn't know I had. It's weird that this kind of adversity makes me feel more connected to my ancestry than anything else has, but there it is.
But I think I've built up enough character. Can things be easy now?
I've been bouncing back and forth between contentment and anger for a while, even though I walked into the year with the intention to be more considerate with that emotion. It's just so hard to hear about a government that does so much to hurt its citizens and hear knuckleheads online make excuses or deny any of it is happening. Sometimes it just feels like the human race is trying to push itself off the cliff into oblivion.
Habari gani, fam? Happy New Year! Here is my post for the final day of Kwanzaa -- Imani, or Faith:
https://t.co/e4hISlaCbx
Habari gani, fam? Sorry about missing yesterday's post -- well, sort of. I wrote it and put it up but forgot to mention it here. Also, day 6!
Nia (Purpose): https://jakebe.com/2017/12/30/kwanzaa-day-5-nia-purpose/
Kuumba (Creativity): https://jakebe.com/2017/12/31/kwanzaa-day-6-kuumba-creativity/
Habari gani, brothers and sisters? Day four of Kwanzaa is all about Ujamaa, or Cooperative Economics. I like to think of it as Black Empowered Socialism. :)
https://jakebe.com/2017/12/29/kwanzaa-day-4-ujamaa-cooperative-economics/
Day 3 of Kwanzaa focuses on Ujima, or Collective Work and Responsibility: https://jakebe.com/2017/12/28/kwanzaa-day-3-ujima-collective-work-and-responsibility/
Hey folks, I'll be writing about Kwanzaa ALL WEEK on my blog. I want to introduce the holiday to folks who've only heard about it while also talking about why it's personally significant to me. :)
https://jakebe.com/2017/12/26/kwanzaa-day-1-umoja-unity/
A few stray thoughts:
+ MAN, I really want to get started on renewing and running my Pathfinder game again.
+ Progressives really need to think about what they would like to see happen to people who've done terrible things the last two years. We need a plan, with steps from here to our ideals and clear, fair consequences for the folks who got us into this mess.
+ What do you do as an ally belonging to a group with great power but little personal influence? What do we want out of cis white males?
Writing
Still, it's exciting -- I think this is the first time I've written something that is so far short of what's in my head and I haven't been discouraged or quit. I know I can get it closer, but I need it out first so I know more about what I'm working with. I think there are ways to punch up the prurient interests bit for folks WHILE leaning in to character and setting the way I'd like. It'll just take some thought and elbow grease.
Writing
Part of it is this is my very first science-fiction story, and there's a lot more pre-writing that I should have done. Really nailing down the world of the Society, exactly what the tech level is, and how things work is pretty important in the creation of informed and fully-realized characters. Who knew?? I'm muscling through the first draft now, but I also need to make sure I know what to focus on in the revision.
Writing
Right now I'm working on Boundaries, a Patreon serial I've pitched as "Zootopia-meets-Star-Trek"; I really wanted to write a story in a utopian solarpunk society where folks navigated huge personality, physical, and belief differences with respect and grace. It's been fun to write, but this first draft has fallen WAY short of where I want the story to be. I'm trying to hold off on the porn to establish the characters, but they aren't as immediately hooky as I'd like them to be.
Mental Health
One thing this year has taught me is that I'll need to refine my self-care/coping process every now and again. My current collection of medication, mediation and habits is no longer working to help me with the current level of stress -- which has admittedly gone WAY up over the past year.
I'd like to find out if there is a simpler medication course I can take for depression/anxiety/ADHD, but I also need to double down on sleep, diet and exercise habits. Those have been terrible. D:
A digital jackalope living in a black man's body. Pronouns: he/him/his. I love my blackness, and yours.