Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

now because i am an asshole i am going to play Blank Banshee's "Teen Pregnancy" at sugarfoot, albeit at a gentle low volume 'cause she's got enough stress without humans being sarcastic at her

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQxDM2K-hd0

yeah this account will basically be un-cwed feline maternity ward for the foreseeable future, let me know if that's a big problem

two healthy lookin little grey-black lumps so far, definitely alive and squirming and peeping

they are adorable as fuck and i teared up a bunch as i said welcome to our world guys

i did venture a tiny little pet to the back of sugarfoot's neck just to reassure her and she didn't seem to mind at all -- i kept my stupid paw WELL away from the babies

@Soreth luckily my first reaction was "let's give her a few minutes to recover from the first kitten... and then let's very gently move this box to MY room where the floor is linoleum and can be rendered completely devoid of competing physical objects esp. porous ones D:

brace yrselves, if things do get veterinarily complicated there will almost certainly need to be a gofundme because we were already getting close to flat broke

thank god my boss still loves me

we will do what we can for you sugarfoot, we even decided if there's a complication, yeah, we will find a 24 hr vet and go into debt for you

no greater love hath dragon and tiger for stupid horny minipanther and her... two so far... adorable thrashing gremlin lumps

i just really hope your mom isn't in similar straits, though i guess we do have another box and sacrificable blanket 🙀​

no time for a kitty alert

holy fuck shadow has already dropped two kittens in the box we were preparing for her just in case our hunch she was preggers was right

it was so very right 🙀​

so far looks like the conventional wisdom is "just give her food, litter, water, and a nesting box and LEAVE HER THE FUCK ALONE" but if you have any other advice we are not in a position to turn it away

especially about just how much poop i should expect to clean off my floor in the next 6-8 weeks 🙀​🙀​🙀​

@001zlnv this is just the best story

i have never identified so thoroughly with a comedy bang bang character.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFEWGJZkTmw [cw: arguably fatphobic but i'm sorry it's still funny as shit; also TERRIBLE raccoon-grade food combinations]

The good: looks like the storm's gonna give us a miss and hit Lafayette instead, only minimal impacts in this area; also our dealer promised he'd come by today n.n;

The bad: Aww, christ, I think we missed our deadline for getting a vet consultation and getting the gals snipped. Shadow is [1] uber-affectionate [2] feeling a little lumpy in the belly area if it's not my imagination [3] very very loud. I think we might have another friggin' batch of kittens on the way. Also, yeah, Penny and Peebs have definitely wandered off.

I know they're Not Our Cats and we're doing more for them than most semiferals get, but even amid the spoonlessness of COVID and our global pay cut at work, I'd really hoped to do more for all of them. It would have been nice to find them all proper homes.

Still, Umbra and Moe (Larry? we literally could not tell the three tabby Stooges apart though we're pretty sure Shemp was Curly) didn't have any trouble finding cushy homes. NOLA is an egregiously good city for cats; there are water dishes and food bowls on almost every block.

I just really wish I could have saved them all personally forever and ever. And I don't think we can offer Shadow indoor space like our neighbor used to, if she is preggers. The best we can do is provide food and maybe a nice box with some blankets out in our (laughably permable to cats) bike shed.

C'est les chats. 🤷​

This is the single silliest song that consistently makes me cry.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3VOFuf8uEhU

@Phorm LOTS. Oh no. :)

Arthur ran away and hid under the bed for 10 minutes because a piece of food fell off of my pizza and dropped right in front of her nose.

Let me make sure I got that across: Arthur was defeated by a piece of bacon.

I think this is the first serious Failure To Cat Correctly I've ever seen out of what is normally a very skilled catter.

Thank you all for the good wishes. I think we'll be OK, and after a 20-minute Arthur-pettin' session my biggest anxiety is that the little shit will finally succeed in eating one of my toes. =^_^;=

@zx3 great thanks buddy now i'm gonna die humming the theme from airplane <3

And, I mean, FUCK that top forecast is scary.

Listen, I mean, I calculated the approximate mortality rate of Hurricane Katrina and it was something like 1 in 2850 in Louisiana.

And I did some more panic-research and confirmed that not only was Katrina a direct hit on New Orleans -- whereas Delta is currently expected to hit somewhere around Lafayette, >100 miles west -- the damage really was largely because the ACOE fucked up a levee project and they didn't hold up. Those levees have gotten a lot of love and attention, hopefully the competent sort, since then.

But still. Just in case.

I've had a really interesting life and honestly while I can think of far better ways to go, it's an adventure innit, and I don't know if I really have any serious regrets. Love you all lots.

Yeah, not lovin' this at all.

If you've never read one of these before, it's not QUITE as scary as the track (right over NOLA 😨​) or the intensity graph (Cat 4 max 😱​) make it look.

If you check the hourly markers, they almost all have Hurricane Delta hitting us around the 96 hour mark. By that point, the storm's decelerated to a Cat 1 (which is a walk in the park for us) or a Cat 2 (which isn't, but NOLA's well-equipped for it).

And that one Cat 3 scenario is from the CTCI model. That's the one that flings way east to the Florida panhandle and if that's the case I genuinely wish them the best of luck.

Still. Argh. That's a REAL tight margin. Our local go-to weathe retiree Bob Breck is bearish on Delta and is pretty confident cooler waters in the N Gulf will take the piss out of it. But a possible Cat 4 in that close of a margin does not make me any LESS anxious about my life.

GEORGE ZIMMER'S LAW OF PAREIDOLIA:

Any conspiracy theory based on a crease, wrinkle, or other feature of a political figure's clothing in a still photo will turn out to be 100% bullshit, regardless of affiliation or ideology.

There are zero exceptions. I guarantee it.

@balinares Or to let an admired role model speak for me...

XD <3

@balinares The short answer is "no, I've tried and the bureaucracy required would have far too high of a Sanity Point cost."

Also... I mean... I appreciate the concern massively. <3 <3 <3 But it's the middle of a pandemic and I've felt like this (to this extent) for all of a day, so... :)

My *general* mh is pretty good given the city's shut down! :) <3