Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

o/` You're a bumble
o/` You're a bumble
o/` You're a tiny little bumble
o/` And I outmass you six miliion times
o/` So now you get to go in the BOX

-- Traditional, "The Bumble Escape Song"

(Translation: "Did you know that I fucked your mom?")

Crude and misogynistic, I know, but this is the deepest of the Internet Swamps and I feel a certain obligation to smell like my prey.

mama tigress is having a real shitty day and dammit she's gonna go looking for prey to chew on until she feels better

@hystericempress and you never had to live through dialup speeds, sis. 24 minutes for one goddamn Tygger Graf leopard boi at 2400 baud off the Stormgate Aerie node. :D

#oniononmybelt

@anthracite you've more than earned it <3

really stressful day, just lots of little stuff, but i just realized how much harder it would be if you folks weren't here <3 <3 <3

YOU HAVE UNLOCKED AN ACHIEVEMENT:

"KITTEN GOT MAH BALLS!"

(It's fine. I'm fine. It was kind of cute and only stung for a moment.)

THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY.

THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY. THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY. THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY.

THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY. THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY.

THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY.

THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY. THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY. THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY. THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY.

THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY. THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY.

THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY.

THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY.

THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY. THE CATS ARE DOING JUST FINE, WENDY.

*cut to a portrait of the Overlook Cat Cafe, July 4th 1921; one of the adoptables batting at a feather is a Martian tigress*

TL;DR: Cats are fine; we're losing our marbles. :)

Rough night last night after getting back from urgent care for the nip (for which I have forgiven Sugarfoot, poor thing's been stressed out by Sad Kitten Noises during the rescue and whatnot).

Lots of noise and fussing from the next room while Sugarfoot scratched at the fabric Kitten Barrier under our bedroom door and mewed needily.

We were really afraid that it meant the switch to a new non-clumpy cat litter had confused her and she was looking for help finding a place to poop.

I checked on her and she was just... clingy and needed some love? She sprawled out and quieted down instead of doing the Poopy Dance. I checked again in the morning... and found the litterbox had been used! Yay! I never thought I'd be so happy to see a filthy catbox. :)

Sugarfoot and the Bumblers (the cats, not the blues-rock band) have been nappy and friendly all morning. I am grateful. I still get just a little bit of anxiety just from having them in my possibility space, adorable little balls of potential heartbreaking crisis and ambiguity.

it's absolutely terrifying how much consolation this twitter account gives me in my current situation

=^_________^=

https://twitter.com/ManyManyPenny [CW: ADORABLE MEMETIC HAZARD ALSO CATS]

*gets back from clinic*

*alternates laughing and sobbing for about a week*

Everything's okay, bite is minor and I've got antibiotics for it. Should come to around $140-150 tops. We'll be okay thanks to your donations but not great.

I think I can pull it off, though. We go back to pre-covid salaries as of next pay cycle or so, and I pay dramatically less for insurance as of next year.

And it's worth it. Sugarfoot is a bitey asshole but she's also the sweetest kitty. I can accept that she's both at once. We will learn how to read each other.

@anthracite @xinjinmeng i like the cut scene where she specifies "BAD PEOPLE" have kidnapped her, as opposed to " I HAVE BEEN ABDUCTED BY THE LOVELIEST BUNCH OF PEOPLE"

and sugarfoot (understandably after the last few days) got jumpy and nipped me again, drew blood pretty bad this time

not taking any chances, am at urgent care, thats another 150 down the drain plus lost work hours

i cant handle much more of this, its just daily

@kelseyhusky eventually? :)

@balinares As usual my dear friend you drastically overestimate us. XD Assume we know NOTHING. XD That is great advice, thank you! If Sugarfoot has any troubles -- and she sure did with the twig-style litter we tried last -- we'll give that a shot!

OK, got like $100 in pet supplies from Petco, skimmed people's advice for 4-5 week olds (THANK YOU <3 ), and switched out the clumpy cat litter for some non-clumping clay pellets that we're hoping Sugarfoot will figure out is litter. We also set up a starter litterbox for the babies in a tupperware container.

It looks like all we have to do now is keep an eye on that and the weaning process. Mama's got them covered in terms of supplemental feeding, and apparently it's fine that they're nibbling at dry food for a bit, so we can introduce them to the wet stuff a little at a time. It's probably smart to get them used to eating both types anyhow, right?

Peg is so done with cat stuff right now, poor thing. And yet she STILL helped me out with the litter switch and the shopping.

hey folks, sugarfoot's kittens (the month-olds) have started eating from their mama's bowl

this is probably pretty good and means weaning is ahead of schedule and mama's mostly got it covered

but it also probably means they'll be pooping soon D:

and we have been so drained from caring for the other kittens i've fallen way behind on my kitten lifestages research

could i possibly delegate to you kind people and get a summary of what i need to be doing for them at five weeks in, esp. in terms of feeding and litterbox, god i have so many other things i need to be doing today

ty ty ty ty ty <3 <3 <3

@xinjinmeng there's a fantasy world out there where crows randomly wake up afflicted delusions of professional obligations...

...and here we are stuck with fuckin' Westeros and the MCU -___-

One last dose of cat stress! Just before we left to get Peg a DESPERATELY NEEDED meal, we heard Sad Cat Noises from next door and couldn't find Artie.

I've heard those noises before and they generally turned out to just be more like Bored Cat Noises -- and Peg was faltering bad and we still haven't restocked our kitchen since the #$!##% hurricane. So I agreed to keep going, but of course fretted the whole walk out and back.

Long story short: we got back and Artie was fine. All cats are accounted for and safe, and the three we had to consign to the fates have the luckiest fates we could secure for them.

I'm just so fucking proud of my wife today.

@balinares peg deserves all the credit, i had been ready to give up. i think it was a moral decision because i did not think i had it in me to save them, and had not even begun to understand peg APPARENTLY DID. it took so much out of her though and now its my turn to step up and play supporting roles until shes recovered.